values


Coaching with Logical Levels 3

In this week’s guest post Phil Manington shares how he uses a specific NLP model.

"Coaching with Logical Levels" A guest post by Phil Manington

Coaching with Logical Levels

By Phil Manington

Anyone familiar with NLP will probably have come across Robert Dilts’s Logical Levels model. It is a great tool for exploring how and why we do what we do. It works at a system level and provides a powerful way of creating sustainable change in an individual or organisation.

It looks at our thinking across six levels:

  • The Environment level involves the external conditions in which you live. Questions such as: “Where?”, “When?” and “With whom?” are typical Environment level questions.
  • The Behaviour level refers to what you do in different environments.
  • Capabilities (whether mental, physical or emotional) describe how you do what you do. What are your skills and strategies for taking action?
  • Beliefs and Values define why you do something and shape the way you perceive the world. Beliefs can be both empowering and limiting.
  • Identity consolidates whole systems of beliefs and values into a sense of self. It defines who you think you are, as an individual or an organisation.
  • Purpose involves your connection to something that goes beyond yourself. At this level, useful questions are: “For whom am I doing this?” and “What is my purpose?”.

Many change initiatives focus at the behaviour and capability levels and this can be very effective on occasions. For example, anyone wanting to lose weight will have used exercise and/or dieting to become more fit and healthy.

However, when a client comes for coaching it is usually because they have tried these approaches and they haven’t worked – they are stuck. The Logical Levels model provides a way uncovering the root cause of the situation.

Uncovering the Root Cause

Listening to the client’s language will provide useful pointers to the level that might be important. For example:

  • I usually end up in the kitchen at parties (environment/behaviour)
  • I argue a lot (behaviour)
  • I’m not very good at dancing (capability)
  • People should tell the truth (belief)
  • I want to be less stressed (value)
  • That’s just the sort of person I am (identity)

You may notice your client is focussing around certain levels – you can gather more information by asking questions that take them to other levels. For example:

  • What do you feel when that happens? (behaviour)
  • Why is that important to you? (value)
  • What assumptions are you making about this? (belief)
  • What does that say about you as a person? (identity)
  • What does that do for you? (value)

.

Making Changes

Clearly the way you help a client change depends on the specific information you uncover but guiding them round the levels can break through seemingly insoluble blocks. Here’s an example:

After my marriage broke up, I suffered a crisis of confidence and was thrown back into an old set of beliefs about not being attractive to women. My friends encouraged me to “just get out there” and I knew, rationally that this made sense. After all, one of my favourite books is ‘Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway’! And yet I kept putting it off. My coach and colleague, Steve, helped me shift from this stuck place:

We started with my assertion that “I am not attractive to women” – an identity level statement. Rather than trying to challenge this directly he moved me around the levels. He said:

“OK, let’s put that to one side for a moment – tell me what your strengths are”.

I listed a number of things and he picked up on something that I said about learning. Not only am I good at learning but I am passionate about it – I love it. So we had established a capability and a core value for me.

His next question was a great example of elegant coaching:

“So, returning to your relationship with women, who do you know who’s good at it?”

This is a loaded question, with a presupposition that relating to women is a skill issue, not an identity one. Of course, I could name several people and we discussed what they did that seemed to work. His next question:

“So, do you think you could learn to do some of those things?”

was met with cautious optimism and I finished our session with the belief that being attractive was more about skill and behaviour rather than identity – and I also had practical actions to start improving.

This sort of approach works really well for anyone who has low self-confidence or low self-esteem. It’s particularly dispiriting to hold a limiting belief at the identity level because we don’t feel we can possibly change. But often it is only a belief and by using the Logical Levels model to change the way someone sees themselves (for example, from “that’s just who I am” to “I am just not very skilled yet”), it is possible to facilitate quite profound transformations.

About the Author

Phil Manington is co-founder of Suffolk Coaching Zone. He is a professional trainer, coach and management consultant, specialising in helping businesses and individuals to make successful change and achieve their full potential.

Phil currently offers training, workshops and one-to-one coaching for personal and business clients. Specialist areas include leadership skills, building self-confidence and self-esteem, and improving relationships.

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/SuffolkCoachingZone

Twitter – @SuffolkCZ

Website – http://www.suffolk-coaching.com


Aligning Values & Vision in Your Business

Robert Boyd draws upon over 25 years worth of business experience to share his experlise and knowledge in today’s guest post.

© Atrocity Stock Free Image Dreamstime Stock Photos resized

Aligning Values & Vision in Your Business

by Robert Boyd

What was I thinking?

This thought surely crosses every entrepreneur’s mind in the business start-up frenzy, and intensifies and reverberates after the shingle’s been hung and the last business card’s been carefully arranged in its holder.

Many business owners don’t have a business degree, and some don’t have much experience. Tired of 60-hour work weeks for mediocre pay, many employees swap an ID badge for a DBA. But as time ensues, few escape the letdown of seemingly side-stepped dreams. Even fewer escape the knock back to reality. In fact, most new businesses fail. According to the Small Business Administration, only five percent survive beyond the five-year mark. Business experts tout practical reasons for failure, such as poor planning, wrong location, insufficient capital, overexpansion and the inability to stay current with technology. Some even say starting a business for the wrong reason breeds failure. Whatever the cause, fantasies of hundred dollar bills and weekday afternoons in the movie theater dim as exhaustion and reality take root.

Let’s use an example: A transition from a solo psychology practice into a wellness center that offers varied services like nutrition, massage and counseling. Visions of dollar signs and one free Saturday a month jump in the owner’s head. She hires. She gets checks. She fires. She writes checks. She’s tired. She begins thinking that maybe life wasn’t as bad as it was. She wonders what she was thinking.

What were you thinking? What were you thinking? What were you thinking? Why did you shift?

Money and freedom are fine values, and while we may indeed value them for material gain, money often symbolizes deeper values. The truth is, we can make money doing absolutely anything: Selling hot dogs at the beach. Working at the home store. Building skyscrapers. Walking labradoodles. So why this?

A closer look reveals that in the example, under our business endeavor lays the business owner’s personal values. Self-reliance, freedom of choice and equality are fully expressed in the expanded center through the nature of the service (self reliance), the varied services (freedom of choice) and by combining stigmatized counseling services with mainstream, well-accepted services (equality), while only one was expressed in the solo practice (self-reliance). And in this example, the value of money actually came to mean security and freedom, not just money for the sake of having it.

Exercise: Google “values list”. Print it out. Scan it visually and narrow it to fifteen concepts that you value and that guide your actions. Then trim it to five, then three. Entrepreneur or not, determine how your business endeavor expresses each of these values. This may require some reflection, but is an exercise well worth doing.

Our values guide us in both daily decisions and in life-changing choices, including professional success. Reminding ourselves of our ‘why’ pulls us forward when a venture starts to sour or stall. It’s easy to lose sight of your vision with those debt and stress-induced blind spots.

Values infuse passion when little else sustains us. Doing business without them generates the ordinary. Values birth vision. Be extraordinary—in business and in life.

About the Author/Further Resources

Robert Boyd, Managing Director of SportsEquip and an expert in the equipment & surfaces used by elite sportsmen & athletes. Robert has been in the industry for over 25 years providing football goals, tennis nets & cricket equipment to schools, clubs & the general public.

 

Image above title © Atrocity | Stock Free Images & Dreamstime Stock Photos


Going for Gold: What coaches can learn from the upcoming Olympics 2

As Coach Gina Visram is based in the host borough for this years Games she uses it as a topical theme to share her experience, expertise and thoughts in today’s guest post.

going for gold

Going for Gold:

What coaches can learn from the upcoming Olympics

By Gina Visram

This year’s Olympic Games commence in a week, on 27 July 2012 and the sense of anticipation is at its peak. Globally, competitors have done their training and are gearing up to get settled in London for at least a fortnight and spectators are ready to cheer their teams from the comfort of their homes all over the world. For those of us here in the UK and London specifically, we are at the end of a 7 year countdown to the games and while excitement is in the air, there is a definite sense of the 7-year itch… regarding how we view the Games locally.

With recent headlines including “Border staff ‘let in terror suspects’ ahead of Olympics”; “Olympic Travel Chaos looms…” and “The £50m security blunder! G4S admit to Olympic failing over staffing shortfall” – it is clear that the honeymoon period regarding the Olympics is over and it’s now open season to take any opportunity to criticise the Games in any capacity. The popular trend is to highlight what is bad or ugly and shout it from the rooftops to all who will listen.

I don’t know about you but I’ve decided not to be part of that audience. As someone who works in Hackney, one of the Olympic host boroughs, I know my daily routine (and that of many other Londoners) is about to get considerably more challenging on a daily basis.

Nonetheless, I have decided to step away from the flock when it comes to the trend of complaining about the Olympics – and have instead focused on the many positives, including how the global event can inspire us as coaches.

Here are 3 ways we can apply Olympic-related teachings to make us medal winning coaches:

1. Know and live by your values:

The values of the Olympic and Paralympic Games include Excellence, Friendship, Determination, Equality, Inspiration, Courage and Respect. In my coaching training, one of the most insightful areas was the section about the importance of values and beliefs and since, I have seen numerous clients make breakthroughs when we take the time to explore this aspect of their lives. In our daily busy-ness we do not necessarily take the time to assess why we have set the goals we have and what is important to us on a larger scale. Focusing on our values however aids in giving us the strength and focus needed to achieve what we need to, and it is the same for our clients.

Olympic lesson number 1? Know and live by your values… it will make you a better coach and happier individual as you’re being true to yourself

2. If you want it, you have to work for it:

How many Olympic athletes do you know that wake up at 10am? Do you know any that wouldn’t jump at the opportunity to work with the best trainers in their event? Would an Olympian decide that they “can’t” do what they set out to?

This committed, determined attitude is one that we’d do well to adopt as coaches. For those of us at the stage where we are building our businesses around a full time position, as well as for those that have taken fully the leap – it’s important to remember that to get to our desired stage in business development, it may be necessary to face early starts and late nights. In addition, experiencing some of our coaching heroes live (at talks or workshops) is the closest we may get to working with a dream trainer… and potentially as beneficial.

Olympic lesson number 2? Your success as a coach will not come from passively waiting for opportunities to come to you. If you really want career success, consistently hard work and training from experts in the field will have a positive impact on your aims

3. Seek opportunities beyond the obvious:

In addition to seeking competitive opportunities such as the Olympics, athletes look at how they can maximise their potential even beyond this main goal. Jessica Ennis, World and European heptathlon gold medallist has advertised Powerade, Adidas, Olay and more; Cyclist Victoria Pendleton is a face of Hovis; and Sir Chris Hoy is an ambassador for Proctor & Gamble (P&G). They are serious competitors who give their all in their sports but have also recognised that their fame is lucrative to their lifestyles, and understandably explore these options.

Olympic lesson number 3? Be open. Seek less obvious routes to your coaching success. Take speaking opportunities and consider anything which may not have initially come to mind when you set that first coaching related goal. Sometimes by seeking opportunities beyond the obvious, you can end up in a better place than you had even intended.

The success of London’s Olympic and Paralympic Games remains to be seen, but from my little corner of London, I wish the organisers and athletes every success….and for us coaches, I hope I have given you food for thought in relation to your coaching development… and just a few more reasons to stand away from the naysayers and join in the celebrations.

About the Author/Further Resources

Profile 1 GV shoot reducedGina Visram is a career development coach, working with people to maximise or regain their focus and drive to achieve key goals. In recognition of how important it is to focus and flourish in times of major transition in life, Gina is especially passionate about working with students; young professionals; budding business owners; newlyweds and more, all determined to unlock their own potential.

She is also a newlywed who is proud to have survived and learned from the unique experience of being a ‘royal wedding bride’ (married on the same date as Prince William & Kate Middleton… we chose the date first!) and specialises in coaching newlyweds through a state of the post-wedding blues to post-wedding productivity.

Gina has been published in newspaper The Voice and website Wedding TV, is in the process of writing her first book, “Happily Ever After for Grown Ups” and is excited that through preview chapters, available via www.post-wedding.com, clients have been known to gain clarity and confidence, achieving goals such as significant pay increases after applying the programme.

To find out more, visit:

Website: www.limitlesscoaching.com.

Blog: www.limitlesscoaching.blospot.com

Post wedding related blog: www.royalweddingcountdown.wordpress.com

… and You can also follow her on Twitter @limitlesscoach and @bridemotivation.

 

Background on Image above title via: FreeDigitalPhotos.net


Discover your ‘Book of Rules’…

In this week’s guest post Evolved Master Coach Morgan Tinline shares insights and explainations about how we are “wired.”

Discover your ‘Book of Rules’…

by Morgan Tinline

As an Evolved Master Coach, I work almost entirely with the unconscious mind – also called the conditioned mind. This is where clients experience lasting change that happens very quickly. I assist clients to essentially change their ‘wiring’ so that they choose to be cause and create the life they desire.

As is my foremost objective when in a coaching session, I want to offer you the opportunity to gain massive value from this post simply by enjoying it for yourself in whatever way is best for you!

So, from my perspective as an Evolved Master Coach, I want to share with you some information on how we are ‘wired’ and more importantly, how that ‘wiring’ serves us as individuals on an unconscious level. And of course, I’d love for you to gain insights into how to change that wiring almost effortlessly!

Let’s start with how we perceive and process our world…

Internal Representations:

Your internal representation will to a great extent determine your focus. You will soon learn that you get what you focus on. Your focus determines your thinking; your thinking determines your behaviour, which determines your results.

The Five senses (VAKOG) supply information from the outside world directly to the conditioned mind for processing/filtering. This information together with our Self-Talk (Ad) creates our Internal Representation.

Your unconscious mind is symbolic and it thinks and communicates using V, A, K, O, G and Ad. In order to use our minds effectively we need to use all of our Internal Representations, aligning them with what we want.

Think of all the signs that you see for caution or warning… “Don’t Slip” for example (with a picture of a man slipping). Remember that the unconscious mind doesn’t process negatives directly. The mind processes everything through VAKOG all the time. Rather state everything in the positive, FOCUS ON WHAT YOU WANT.

What feeling and images are in your mind when you think of yourself slipping on a wet floor? What kind of internal representation would that create? Our Internal Representation becomes our focus… we tend to produce the necessary behaviour to manifest that. This is the basis for effective change.

“Don’t think of a pink elephant”

Realise that you can’t think about what you don’t want to think about without thinking about it.

So all 5 senses and our self talk together, make up our Internal Representation. Now ask “What am I focusing on? Is my focus positive?” From now on this includes all 6 things we can do in our minds. Are all the systems supporting you towards successful achievement of your goal? This will make a huge difference in your life.

picture for Morgan Tinline guest post dec 11

Our mind sorts information into 7 ± 2 chunks of information. Our Internal Representation constantly combined with our Physiology creates our State. State dictates our Behaviour and we create certain Results in our lives.

Focus Filters

What are you focusing on? Is it towards what you want or towards what you don’t want? Are you focusing on what you want or are you focusing on what you don’t want?

Core Focus Filters – (Internal Acid Test)

Our core focus filters are our human needs. This model has been adopted from Anthony Robbins, who says “You don’t always get what you want, but you always get what you need.”

These needs are not wants and desires, but profound needs which service the basis of every choice we make.

You will always find a way to fulfil your core needs, either in a positive, negative or neutral way.

There are 6 basic human needs:

Certainty

This is our need for safety, security, consistency and predictability.

Variety

The opposite of certainty is our need for uncertainty, variety, the unknown, risk, challenges.

Significance

This is our need for being important, being needed, feeling worthy, unique, status

Love / Connection

Our need for connection, intimacy, love, sharing, bonding

The first 4 human needs Certainty, Variety, Significance, Love / Connection are the needs of the body/personality. People will do ANYTHING to meet these needs, one way or another.

The needs of our spirit or soul are met through Growth and Contribution…

Growth

Our need for growth, expansion, learning, becoming more… when we stop growing, we die. We need to constantly develop emotionally, physically and spiritually.

Contribution

Our need to go beyond our own needs and contributing to others, making a difference in others lives, helping, educating, coaching.

We tend to focus on two; the dominant two influence our behaviour the most.

Exercise:

1) Write down all the ways you currently get: Certainty, Variety, Significance, Love/Connection, Growth and Contribution in your life in general.

2) Answer the following questions (take your time and think about it).

a) What is it that drives you? What are your top 2 Core Focus Filters? Which two do you value the most?

b) How does this impact the quality of your life? What are the consequences (positive and negative) of valuing these needs in this order?

Process Focus Filters – (Inner Parent)

These are process driven that shape our Focus and our reality.

Meta Programs

Values

Beliefs

Memories

Decisions

Attitudes

Language

Time/Space/Matter/Energy

Key Focus Filter – (Internal Driver)

This holds the Key of your Focus. It determines what is and what isn’t important, based on all the other filters. Your mind created a question that sums up all your filters together. It filters your conscious and unconscious thinking, all the time. It is basically the question that you keep asking yourself consciously or unconsciously, no matter what you are doing. You filter all information coming in through your 5 senses all 400 Billion bps as if your life depended on it. How important do you think this question is?

And now, for the even more amazing stuff. For those of you want to discover your own unconscious ‘instruction manual’…

 

Book of Rules Exercise:

 

What is important in your life?

List the top 5 things that you value in life. What is life about for you? What are you striving for, what would you like to feel or experience in life?

 

1. ___________________________________________________________________

2. ___________________________________________________________________

3. ___________________________________________________________________

4. ___________________________________________________________________

5. ___________________________________________________________________

 

(For each of the above that you listed answer the following question)

For you to feel/experience __________ , what needs to happen, what needs to be present in order for you to feel that way or to experience that?

 

1. ___________________________________________________________________

2. ___________________________________________________________________

3. ___________________________________________________________________

4. ___________________________________________________________________

5. ___________________________________________________________________

 

In the past, what have been the feelings you would do almost anything to avoid?

List here the top 5, your biggest ‘Away From’:

 

1. ___________________________________________________________________

2. ___________________________________________________________________

3. ___________________________________________________________________

4. ___________________________________________________________________

5. ___________________________________________________________________

 

(For each of the above that you listed answer the following question)

For you to feel/experience __________ , what needs to happen, what needs to be present in order for you to feel that way or to experience that?

 

1. ___________________________________________________________________

2. ___________________________________________________________________

3. ___________________________________________________________________

4. ___________________________________________________________________

5. ___________________________________________________________________

 

Most people make it really difficult to achieve their ‘Towards Values’ and really easy to achieve their ‘Away Values’. Why not make it really easy to achieve your towards by using OR, and make it really difficult to achieve Away but using AND.

 

I trust you have enjoyed asking some of the right questions for the answers you’ve always had! You can email me with any questions/queries and feedback. Send email to mo****@***********ow.com

In conclusion, I leave you with the words of my friend and mentor…

“May you find all that you seek outside, inside of you.” – RS

About the author

blavatarMorgan Tinline is an Evolved Master Coach currently living in South Africa. He is passionate about people and assisting them in accessing their massive potential. Add to that his past personal experience and triumph over severe depression as well as overcoming Bipolar Disorder without any medical assistance or traditional therapy, and you get a coach who loves every bit of his 100% success rate.

Specialising in self-sabotage, Morgan is currently building a platform through which even more people can choose to have instant and lasting change and live the life they desire.

Stay informed of what is happening as well as upcoming visits to various countries around the world in 2012 and beyond. Go to www.epiclivingnow.com, follow him on twitter @EpicLivingNow, and like his page on facebook – Epic Living