TED Talk Tuesday 5th August 2014
This week’s TED Talk clip is from an independent TEDx event:
Does money make you happy | Kylian Wawoe | TEDxHaarlem
Clip length: 10 mins 39 secs
Prefer to watch on TED.com? In that case you’ll need to click here.
money
Sacred Money, Sacred Life Transformational Exercise
In today’s guest post coach Debra Larson shares an exercise, complete with a worksheet that you can download at the bottom of this post, and a free gift.
Sacred Money, Sacred Life Transformational Exercise
By Debra Larson
Most people, I really believe, are living their life not feeling fulfilled or as if they’re living on purpose. I think you probably all agree with me. Look around. That’s what you see. Maybe you’ve even felt that yourself in the past. I know I have.
That’s why I got into business for myself. I was feeling really unfulfilled and like I wasn’t living my purpose. I also felt like my future was being left up to someone else. If any of you have connected with my story on my website, you’ll know and understand that at the point that Eric and I lost everything that I had made a decision if that should ever happen again, I’d be able to rebuild quickly and I’d love doing it. Big difference, right? I’d actually know how and enjoy the process of rebuilding and I’d know I could do it quickly. I knew at that moment I was ready to build again my own business, but this time it looked much different than before, I was training others how to live a fulfilled life, in complete abundance with sharing their knowledge with others and really enjoying it.
I want to help you take your actions and what you’re doing daily and put them into perspective so that you have a way of living your life and appreciating your life at a much deeper level than you ever have.
I teach an exercise that is called “Sacred Money, Sacred Life” taken straight from my Simply Wealthy Sacred Money Archtype© Align your Financial & Spiritual Destiny course which is a very deep, thought- ‐provoking exercise, its a very powerful exercise, very illuminating.
We are going to go ahead and do this exercise together.
Put on some soft music, make sure the rest of the house is quiet and take some time for you. Many people don’t think about these things, and when you do it can be life changing – very transformational.
Just remember that “allowing” the emotions to flow can be a good thing, it means that you are healing and moving forward.
Sacred Money, Sacred Life, is designed to help you let go of the things that don’t matter in life and to focus on what does matter most.
This is the sad irony. What matters most is often what gets lost in the hustle and bustle of daily life. I am here to help you put that back front and center.
The second piece of this putting it all together in the Discovering Your Financial Life Purpose exercise, but I will not be teaching this here today.
This is a journaling type of exercise with four questions that build upon each other.
I would love for you to have the benefit here and now with me today to start to write answers for yourself, don’t wait, take action today.
The first segment of these four pieces is called purpose and impact.
I want you to imagine for a moment that you have all the money you need to live the life of your dreams. Take that in for a moment. You have all the money you need to live the life of your dreams.
With that taken care of, what do you spend time on? What do you feel is your purpose? What impact do you focus on creating? Who do you feel called to help? Why do feel compelled to do this?
This is a moment to be as specific as you can and to really allow yourself to dream. Take a few seconds just to write down any first thoughts that come up.
The second question here is on perspective and priorities.
You’ve just learned that you only have five more years of life. The end will come without notice.
Knowing the end of your life is coming sooner rather than later, what changes will you make? What will you do with this all- ‐important final phase of your life? What will give your life meaning? What’s the legacy that you want to leave?
Journal the first answers that come to mind. Don’t second guess the answers. Just write.
The next section is completion and closure.
You’ve just been told you only have one day left of life.
What are you feeling?
Are there any regrets or disappointments? Do you have dreams you wish you had fulfilled? Is there anything you wish you had done differently now that your life is about to be complete?
Journal the answers that come to you – First answer, best answer.
For some of you this is bringing up a bit of emotion, take a deep breath and just write what comes.
“You’ve just been told you only have day of life…what are feeling? Do you have unfilled dreams – regrets, what would you do differently?
The final section is realization and renewal.
Looking back at what you journaled in this exercise, what are you saying you want to change in your life?
What choices or decisions will you now make? What are the main themes that you’re noticing? When I say theme, I mean thread or things in common.
I’d love to hear what you’re already seeing as the value from this exercise, comment below and write what value came – it’s highly personal so you don’t need to give specifics in nature, just what value came from this.
I really love this exercise because it’s a bit of a wake-up call for many of you. Great job!
So the power in this exercise comes from this final section “realization and renewal.” I want you to create some concrete action steps you can now take. Be specific. Many of you will have the inclination to be very sweeping and general with your answers.
Let’s take the question:
“What choices or decisions will you now make?” You may say, “I’m going to make new choices about things that make me happier.” That’s very nice, but that doesn’t really mean anything. I want you to get really specific on the action, choice or decision.
There’s no right or wrong way to do this exercise, but you want to be aware of taking you to a more concrete, specific place of action as a result or as a next step of this exercise. That’s what I want you to be looking for in the realization and renewal section.
If you said, “I need to make decisions that bring more happiness in my life,” I would say, “That’s great. What is one of those decisions right now?” I just want you to chunk it down and be specific.
Now here is your Simply Wealthy Action Step: I want to ask you to set a timer for 15 minutes, grab something to sip on such as a cup of coffee or tea, wine, whatever – just relax and take yourself through this exercise in detail. Really dive into this, and do this by yourself and for yourself. You can share it a friend, maybe share it in our comments box below – just share it in some way to really deepen your findings here. State what insights and aha’s come from doing this exercise.
Most importantly, Do this for YOU!
Discover your Sacred Money Archetypes and step into your Divine Financial Abundance
Yours FREE!
Sacred Money Archetype Empowerment 4u! Discovery Kit
- Determine your Sacred Money Archetype’s Assessment
- Complimentary SMA Empowerment 4u! Session
- Beautiful, full-colored downloadable Sacred Money Archetype Cards
…. valued at $297
Are you ready to create deep, powerful transformation around money?
During our time together you will discover and learn for free:
- Learn your personal Sacred Money Archetypes, revealing the most profitable actions you can take to increase your income and secure your financial freedom and future.
- Key areas where you may be giving away your power with money, and identify steps you can take to own your value, with confidence and clarity.
- The one simple next‐best step you can take immediately.
Leave the session inspired and crystal clear about the next steps to aligning your financial success with your personal and spiritual growth.
FREE GIFT: www.DebraLarson.com/sma/
About Debra Larson
Did you enjoy this article? Would you like to use it? Feel free, just make sure you READ and copy Debra’s information below along with the exact reprint of the article:
Debra Larson is a Transformation & Wealth Coach, founder of Simply Wealthy by Debra.
Debra, an award, winning coach, Amazon best-selling author, empowers women around the world on how to turn their own true gifts, passions and purpose into a profitable, meaningful business thru simple, doable – yet result driven concepts and systems. She prides herself in helping her clients achieve transformational results by weaving timeless truths and Universal Laws with mastery marketing counsel, teaching on everything from mindset to marketing that assists you in growing yourself while empowering you to fulfill your life’s purpose. You can find out more about Debra and get free tools, tips and steps to becoming simply wealthy in your business & in life at: www.DebraLarson.com
Want a paper copy of the exercise in the post above? The download option is below:
[gview file=”http://www.coachingconfidence.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/sma-sacred-life-mod3.pdf”]
Coaching Quote of the Day 16th July 2014
“First, have a definite, clear practical ideal; a goal, an objective. Second, have the necessary means to achieve your ends; wisdom, money, materials and methods. Third, adjust your means to that end.”
(Aristotle)
Coaching Quote of the Day 3rd July 2014
“Money is a good servant but a bad master.”
(Francis Bacon)
“Dear money, thank you for . . . .”
In today’s guest post coach Helen Collier shares a personal thank you ….
“Dear money, thank you for . . . .”
Yesterday, just before I sat down to write this blog post, a prompt dropped into my inbox. It asked ‘If you were to write a thank you letter to money what would you say?’
What an intriguing question. What would I say? Would it be like one of those countless letters I wrote to my aunts thanking them for the talcum powder, done out of duty rather than real appreciation? What on earth would I say to money if I was thanking it. Here’s what I said:
Dear Money
I’m writing this to say thank you for all the great gifts you’ve given me over the years.
I can’t remember you at all for the first few years of my life. You must have been there, no matter how much or how little.
Then the memories start to return.
In my early years there wasn’t a lot of you around. I’m not sure at what point I began to notice this. The people around me all seemed to have the same amount of money. Or did they? There was a fear in the background. (How will we manage? You’ve not paid your stamp! I do my best! There’s a baby on the way.)
All hazy thoughts of the messages that seemed to relate to you. But what were you doing? You were just there. Sometimes more of you (my horse has come in), sometimes less of you (there’s never enough). And here I am.
I have such lovely memories of you. You bought us treats on Saturday night. It was amazing what we could get for 5 shillings (25p) to satisfy the sweet tooth of 5 children and 2 adults. Walnut whip, sherbet lemons, pear drops, chocolate éclairs. You were always there for those Saturday Nights. Thanks for the memories and the tastes.
You felt wonderful as someone passed a piece of you to me on that Whit Sunday Walk. I pushed you into the palm of my hand inside my glove. As the walk continued my glove filled up with money.
I can feel it now. Too much money for a little girl to hold in her hand alone.
When did I realise I could trade you for an Ice Cream and that it could taste so good? When did I move from saying to the second person that gave me a coin,
‘It’s all right I’ve got one already’(how sweet),
to getting really excited and wondering when I’d get the next one, in anticipation of that ice cream? (How greedy) Was it you that was different or was it me as I learned my money dance? Money gets you things (shouldn’t want things). Money, you were just there, sometimes less of you sometimes more of you. Thank you for the delicious ice cream!
The way you slipped into the little charity envelopes, one coin into each of the seven pockets. I loved the feel (money’s tight, there’s not enough). But there you were and there was I and this was helping the children of Africa (good girl).
Thank you money for simply feeling so lovely and snug in those envelope pockets.
In teenage years I began to see that some people had more than others (There’s those that have and those that don’t. We don’t. Can’t change it. That’s how it is. Mustn’t want things, Make do, Must pay your way).
Such shame that I had a second hand uniform. Such shame that I felt shame that I had a second hand uniform (What about the children in Africa?). Such shame that children in Africa didn’t even have a school uniform. Where were you then? You were there, and I was there, and the children in Africa were there.
Do you know money, I need to say a heartfelt thank you for being there in my life – no matter how much, no matter how little, no matter what.
On my way to financial independence, saving for my first ‘grown up’ holiday. One envelope for each expense. One for the travel, one for the B and B, one for spending, one for food. Sixteen by now and I still loved the play part of money. The ordering it, sorting it, anticipation of something good to come. Pride that I was earning and saving it myself. Yet more experiences and learning. Thank you money.
That was the early years and then I got big! It was harder to see you as simply being there. It was easier to adsorb the messages that surrounded you.
People like us don’t have money. If you have money you’re not like us. The only way a working man can get any money is a win on the pools. You have to work hard for your money.
A confusion of messages
Do well. I want more for you. Work to be worthy. Don’t accept gifts of money. Don’t deserve it. If you’ve got money then you’re not us.
More guilt, more shame, more battles, more rebellion. Where were you money? You were just there in different amounts in different places. Thank you money for being there in my life.
In the last few years I’ve been doing more learning and leaning on you. Thank you for being there to support me. There’s still lots to disentangle and I’m seeing more and more that you are simply there as people weave their stories around you. I’m seeing you as a money maypole around which we all dance. With different levels of money, skill, knowledge, understanding, emotion and awareness. Hence the knots, clumps and tangles. Our practical, emotional and spiritual messes around the maypole money.
You’ve been caught and tied up by my mind, my heart and my soul. You’ve tolerated the distortions I’ve woven around you. Thank you for being there no matter how much, no matter how little.
Thank you for continuing to let me dismantle the knots I’ve tied around you so that you can take up your rightful place in my life, no more, no less. Just there.
Helen
X
The prompt came from me! It is one of my ‘Money Prompts to your Inbox’ series. I wasn’t expecting it to land just at that moment! There it was right in front of me, it just seemed right and ripe for this blog.
Writing that letter, this week, showed me just what progress I have made personally in getting money into its rightful place in my life, no more, no less.
As a money coach I help clients explore their relationship with money so they too can begin to untie the knots they’ve created around money and give money its rightful place, no more, no less.
So, use it how you will and maybe write that letter yourself. I’d love to hear about it.
About Helen Collier
Helen Collier is a money coach working with clients around money issues, focusing on relationship and money. She trained with the Money Coaching Institute in California. Helen developed Harmoney as a direct response to her growing disquiet that something was out of balance in the financial world. She set an intention to play her part by supporting people to put money in its rightful place in their lives, no more, no less. Helen writes a weekly column for the Yorkshire Evening News and blogs regularly.
If you want to get free prompts to your inbox for the next month sign up here
You can follow Helen on:
Twitter: www.twitter.com/harmoneylife
Facebook: www.facebook.com/harmoneylife
Linked In: https://www.linkedin.com/in/helencollier
Website: www.harmoneylife.co.uk
Coaching Quote of the Day 13th February 2014
“Money won’t create success, the freedom to make it will.”
(Nelson Mandela)
Coaching Quote of the Day 18th January 2014
“A little thought and a little kindness are often worth more than a great deal of money.”
(John Ruskin)
If money was your lover how would you describe your relationship? 2
In today’s guest post money coach Helen Collier shares some of her experience and knowledge on a topic that can be a stumbling block for coaches (and their clients):
If money was your lover how would you describe your relationship?
By Helen Collier
I often ask groups this question. It usually causes embarrassed laughter. Then responses start to come. Delivered boldly or as aside mutterings,
- ‘In separate rooms’,
- ‘Solid’
- ‘Divorced’
- ‘Tense’
- ‘Comfortable’
and so they go on.
We all have a relationship with money which others may puzzle over, criticise or admire. Some of us have more money than others. Some of us spend what we haven’t got. Some of us hoard and refuse to spend even on the essentials.
Money and emotions run deep
Recently I heard Sir Bob Geldorf describing a time in his life when he had very little money and although he is now a successful, wealthy business man he said ‘I can’t escape the panic that I’m back there’
It’s not unusual for me to meet people who say
- “I earn loads of money and I’m broke”
- “I thought I was doing all the right things and I know the universe will provide but the money isn’t coming, what am I doing wrong?”
- “I just hate spending money, I get a dreadful feeling in the pit of my stomach”
Beneath these statements lay deeper feelings and emotions, often rooted somewhere in earlier experiences.
We all have a personal money story which charts the way money has shown up throughout our lives. As children we learn lessons about money. Quite often many of the lessons aren’t about anything anyone directly set out to teach us. When we are very young we are powerless to have much influence over what happens in our family around money. We make our own sense of what can be a very confusing and contradictory world and we can carry that sense on into our adult lives.
My mentor Deborah Price of the Money Coaching Institute would say that Money is a core survival issue. Woven into the fabric of that £10 note in our purses and wallets are a myriad of beliefs, emotions and reactions which far out weigh the actual monetary value. Am I worth it? Is there enough? Am I enough?
It’s my view that not enough of us have taken the time to really look at money and how it shows up in our lives.
So let’s start now and share some thoughts on this blog.
Here’s that question again and a few more
If money was your lover how would you describe your relationship?
As coaches what sort of issues arise for your clients around money?
How grounded do you feel in relation to money?
What work have you done on your own issues around money, so you’re in a clearer and cleaner place to support your clients?
About Helen Collier
My work as a money coach grew from a growing disquiet before the financial crisis that there was something amiss in the world of money and it wasn’t just £’s and pence. Seeing what was happening in the financial world, a growing reliance on credit and a sense that we could have everything now left me feeling uncomfortable and led me to explore more about the emotional side of money. I trained with the Money Coaching Institute in California to become an accredited money coach. I now work with clients from the inside out, facilitating an understanding of how their past is showing up in their present and, armed with that knowledge, coaching them as they transform their money lives. If you want to contact me click here
Connect with Helen via:
Twitter: https://twitter.com/HarmoneyLife
Linked in:uk.linkedin.com/in/helencollier/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Harmoney/324194636947?fref=ts
Access one of Helen’s free webinars on Money Types at http://www.survivedandthrived.com/Money-Quiz/