“For love is of such potent might, That of misfortune it makes light.” (John Barbour)
Questions For Coaches:
Do you support clients in developing self-love as a way to build resilience, if so, in what ways?
How does practising love for yourself and others impact your ability to stay resilient in tough times?
In what ways can love for your work or passion for your profession help you overcome obstacles?
Bonus Questions
How does focusing on the deeper feeling of love help you navigate difficult situations with clarity and strength?
What impact does love and connection have on your daily life and fostering emotional strength and well-being?
What do you see about the transformative power of love in overcoming misfortune?
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller is a transformative coach dedicated to empowering individuals to get out of their own way and make a meaningful impact in the world. With an impactful, nurturing coaching style, Jen supports clients in unlocking their potential and achieving their goals. As an experienced coach and trainer, she guides clients from self-doubt to success.
Discover how Jen can support you to get out of your own way here.
“Where love reigns, the impossible may be attained.” (Proverb)
I don’t know what sprang to mind when you read this proverb, but does it have a connection to coaching for you?
You may have heard the phrase “holding space” for a client in reference to coaching. The phrase itself makes it sound like another task to add to your to-do list as a coach. And maybe that description fits with your approach. I’m certainly not saying it’s right or wrong; rather, I’m inviting you to consider if it aligns with your coaching experiences.
For me, the space and connection that occur when a client and I settle and seek clarity around a topic have a unique feeling. Part of that feeling, I think, is a sense of peaceful love. Michael Neill describes this space as one where miracles can happen. Just the other week, a client described it as being able to feel the magic in that space.
This isn’t a post about finding an eloquent or elegant way to explain that feeling, but to point towards something that we can sense, even when words fail us. It’s a feeling that, for me, includes a sense of safety, allowing us to play and explore.
The Magic of “Holding Space”
“Holding space” might sound like a task, but it’s more about creating an environment where your client feels safe and supported. It’s about fostering a connection that allows for openness and exploration. When love and trust reign in this space, the impossible often becomes attainable.
The Feeling of Peaceful Love
In those moments of true connection, there’s a palpable feeling—a blend of peace, love, and clarity. This isn’t just about being nice or kind; it’s about genuinely caring for your client’s journey and believing in their potential. This sense of peaceful love can be the catalyst for profound breakthroughs.
Inviting Miracles
Miracles in coaching don’t always mean dramatic, life-altering changes. They can be subtle shifts in perspective, moments of deep insight, or the courage to take a small but significant step forward. By holding space with love and presence, we create the conditions for these miracles to occur.
Creating a Safe Space for Exploration
Safety in coaching isn’t just physical; it’s emotional and psychological. When clients feel safe, they’re more willing to take look at what seems risky, take action, make mistakes as part of learning, and explore new possibilities.
Remember, this post isn’t about having the perfect words but about pointing towards a shared experience that, even when words seem insufficient, can be profoundly felt. It’s about fostering a space where both you and your client can connect deeply, explore freely, and achieve the seemingly impossible.
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller is a transformative coach dedicated to empowering individuals to get out of their own way and make a meaningful impact in the world. With an impactful, nurturing coaching style, Jen supports clients in unlocking their potential and achieving their goals. As an experienced coach and trainer, she guides clients from self-doubt to success.
Discover how Jen can support you to get out of your own way here.
“To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.” (Oscar Wilde)
Yesterday was International Self-Care Day, and I had intended to write this post then. However, when I sat down to write and asked myself what I could do in that moment to take better care of myself, the answer I got was to write this a day later and take a nap—which cleared up the start of a headache right away.
In the past, I would have powered through and written the post regardless. Now, I analyse and prioritize in a much kinder manner to myself. In fact, asking myself, “What can I do in this moment to be kinder to myself?” has become a mental practice I associate with self-care.
I could beat myself up for posting this a day after the actual International Self-Care Day, but why would I do that? I find that posts like this often reach the people who need them most at the right time for them—not necessarily on an arbitrary, declared international day. Moreover, taking care and being kind to yourself is a habit that should extend beyond just one day a year.
So, in that vein, what can you do right now to be kinder to yourself?
I invite you to actually take a moment to ask yourself that question and see what the answer is for you—I can wait while you do that! 😉
I hope you took that moment, and if you’re still reading, I’m guessing your answer wasn’t to stop what you’re doing and have a nap. Maybe it was to adjust your posture, or perhaps just take a moment to focus on your breathing and the simplicity that can bring. Did you take a second to drink more water or change the temperature of the room you’re in?
For some, the answer might have been something with a larger impact—perhaps you realized you didn’t need to dwell on a habitual thought that usually brings you down or had a fresh perspective and saw that you had been looking at something in an unhelpful way.
You may or may not have been surprised by the answer that came to you. If it was followed by a judgmental thought like “I should have known to do that already,” remember: you did know, which is why the answer came to you. And has beating yourself up with such judgmental thinking ever helped you remember faster? Probably not. So how about skipping the self-judgment and seeing what a difference that makes?
If that seems like a big leap, then consider doing it as an experiment. You get to choose how long you run the experiment for—start with a small stretch of time and, if you find that you don’t dislike the experience, extend the experiment a bit longer. By approaching it this way, you can observe the effects of being kinder to yourself without feeling pressured to make a permanent change immediately. Think of it as giving yourself the grace to explore a new way of thinking and being.
Remember, self-care and kindness towards oneself are not confined to a single day, but are ongoing practices that enrich our lives daily. By experimenting with small acts of self-compassion and observing their impact, you can gradually cultivate a more nurturing relationship with yourself.
So today, and every day, ask yourself: “What can I do right now to be kinder to myself?” Embrace the answers that come to you, and let them guide you towards a more balanced and fulfilling life. After all, loving oneself truly is the beginning of a life-long romance.
Thank you for taking the time to read this post. If it resonated with you, feel free to share your thoughts or your own self-care practices in the comments below.
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller is a transformative coach dedicated to empowering individuals to get out of their own way and make a meaningful impact in the world. With an impactful, nurturing coaching style, Jen supports clients in unlocking their potential and achieving their goals. As an experienced coach and trainer, she guides clients from self-doubt to success.
Discover how Jen can support you to get out of your own way here.
“For love is of such potent might, That of misfortune it makes light.” (John Barbour)
Yesterday we looked at being kinder than necessary, today we turn our attention to love. Personally, I’ve found that in the realm of coaching, where transformation and growth are paramount, the essence of love emerges as a potent force. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not talking about love as in romance but that loving acceptance.
This verse, “For love is of such potent might, That of misfortune it makes light,” offers a profound insight into the transformative power of love. It suggests that love possesses a potent strength capable of transcending adversity and illuminating even the darkest of circumstances.
Love, in its purest form, is a force that binds us all together, transcending boundaries and bridging divides. It is a force that inspires compassion, empathy, and understanding, fostering deeper connections and nurturing personal growth. As a coach I’m guided by working from the foundation of innate well-being, resilience, and clarity, embracing love becomes not just a choice, but a way of being.
At the heart of my coaching lies the understanding that love is the foundation upon which transformation thrives. Love serves as a catalyst for healing, offering solace and support to those navigating life’s challenges. When we approach our clients with love, we create a safe and nurturing space where they feel valued, supported, and empowered to explore their innermost thoughts and emotions.
Moreover, love has the remarkable ability to transmute misfortune into opportunities for growth and learning. It allows us to see beyond the surface and embrace the inherent beauty and potential within every situation. By extending love, we acknowledge the inherent humanity within each individual, paving the way for authentic, meaningful interactions that facilitate growth and self-discovery.
However, love towards oneself is equally crucial. Many coaches I talk to find it easier to extend love and compassion to others while neglecting their own well-being. Recognizing this pattern and choosing to cultivate self-love can have a profound impact on one’s own experience and overall effectiveness as a coach. Yesterday, I invited you to set aside time to be kinder to yourself. Today, I invite you to give yourself permission to nurture yourself with love and kindness, allowing yourself to replenish and rejuvenate your spirit.
I don’t know if you have been on the receiving end of a coaching session where the space is just so filled with love and acceptance – realising that it really is OK to be yourself and that the coach will meet you exactly where you are, regardless of who you think you are. It’s an incredibly powerful space to take time to be coached from. I think it’s the feeling in that space that is why that the phrase “For love is of such potent might” resonates with me about coaching.
In conclusion, John Barbour’s verse serves as a poignant reminder of the transformative power of love in our coaching practice. Coaching with the invisible, sometimes means that language can feel/sound clunky, but for me, when it comes to coaching, love is more than just an emotion – it is a guiding principle that shapes our interactions, fosters deeper connections, and facilitates transformative growth. As coaches, let us embrace love as a foundational element of our practice, striving always to cultivate love in ourselves and extend it to others. In doing so, we create a world filled with compassion, understanding, and genuine human connection.
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.
As an experienced coach and trainer, Jen is happy to utilise all skills at her disposal to assist clients from getting out of their own way and making a difference in the world with their coaching. Find out more about the support Jen offers here.
“Life is short and we have never too much time for gladdening the hearts of those who are traveling the dark journey with us. Oh, be swift to love, make haste to be kind!” (Henri-Frédéric Amiel)
In the realm of coaching, amidst the goals, strategies, and growth, it’s easy to overlook the profound impact of love. Yet, Henri-Frédéric Amiel’s timeless words remind us of the essence of our role: “Life is short and we have never too much time for gladdening the hearts of those who are traveling the dark journey with us. Oh, be swift to love, make haste to be kind!”
Love, in the context of coaching, extends far beyond romantic notions. It embodies a deep, unconditional compassion for our clients and a genuine desire for their well-being and success. In that context love fuels our commitment to walk alongside them on their journey, offering unwavering support and encouragement.
But what does it mean to embrace love as coaches?
Authentic Connection: Love begins with authentic connection. Building a genuine rapport with our clients fosters trust and creates a safe space for vulnerability and growth. It involves truly seeing and valuing them as individuals, beyond their goals or achievements.
Empathy and Understanding: Love is empathizing with our clients’ struggles and challenges. It’s about stepping into their shoes, understanding their experiences, and validating their emotions without judgment. Empathy cultivates a deeper connection and allows us to offer more meaningful support.
Unconditional Positive Regard: Love is offering unconditional positive regard. It means accepting our clients wholeheartedly, percieved flaws and all, and believing in their inherent worth and potential for growth. It involves celebrating their strengths and successes while compassionately guiding them through setbacks.
Compassionate Accountability: Love is holding our clients accountable with compassion. It’s about challenging them to stretch beyond what they think are their comfort zones. Compassionate accountability balances high expectations with unwavering support, empowering clients to reach their fullest potential.
Beyond our coaching practice, how can we embody love in our lives?
Cultivating Self-Love: Love begins within ourselves. Taking some time to listen to ourselves, and practicing self-compassion are essential for our well-being and resilience as coaches.
Nurturing Relationships: Love extends to our relationships with family, friends, and community. Investing time and energy into nurturing these connections enriches our lives and strengthens our capacity for empathy and understanding.
Spreading Kindness: Love is contagious. Engaging in acts of kindness and generosity towards others uplifts spirits and fosters a sense of unity and connection within our communities.
Embracing Gratitude: Love is appreciating the beauty and abundance in our lives. Cultivating a practice of gratitude cultivates a positive mindset and deepens our appreciation for the richness of life.
In conclusion, for me. love lies at the heart of coaching, guiding our interactions, decisions, and intentions. What did the quote prompt for you? What else would you add to the lists I started? You’re welcome to add your own thoughts in the comments below.
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.
As an experienced coach and trainer Jen is happy to utilise all skills at her disposal to assist clients from getting out of their own way and making a difference in the world with their coaching. Find out more about the support Jen offers here.
“In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities” (János Arany)
I suspect that this quote will resonate with some coaches who find that it holds the key to unlocking our fullest potential. As with all quotes on here you may find its not one that resonates for you – that doesn’t make your way of coaching any less valid – the quote is purely here as a prompt and an invite to explore.
For many delving into the realms of dreams and love, brings discoveries of boundless opportunities for growth, transformation, and personal development.
Dreams as Catalysts:
It’s not at all uncommon for the language of what a client wants to be phased as their dreams – you’ve probably either used the language yourself or had clients who have said it to you. Coaches often witness the transformative power of helping individuals identify and pursue their dreams. It’s in the pursuit of these dreams that we also often confront challenges, learn resilience, and ultimately evolve into the best versions of ourselves – all of which many coaches list as what they support their clients with.
Dreams can act as catalysts, they can igniting the flame of motivation within us. Sometimes they provide a roadmap for any goals and aspirations, pushing us to overcome obstacles and strive for excellence. I feel that with my approach to how I coach that fostering an environment where a client feels safe to acknowledged their dreams and supported to actively pursued is essential for nurturing personal and professional development.
Love as a Driving Force:
Love, in its myriad forms, is a potent force that permeates every aspect of our lives. Whether it’s loving yourself, love for others, or passion for what we do, love becomes the driving force behind meaningful self-improvement. Coaches, with their unique ability to guide individuals towards self-discovery, often play a pivotal role in helping clients recognize and harness the power of love in their lives – even if you don’t use that specific language to describe it.
You could argue that a cornerstone of a healthy and fulfilling life is loving yourslef. When individuals embrace and cherish themselves, they cultivate a positive mindset that fuels personal growth. Coaches can facilitate this process by encouraging clients to acknowledge their worth, may be you have clients celebrate achievements, and practice self-compassion.
The Intersection of Dreams and Love:
The synergy between dreams and love creates a powerful intersection where possibilities become limitless. When we align our passions with our aspirations and approach self-improvement with a loving mindset, we break through self-imposed barriers. Coaches can guide individuals to explore this intersection, helping them recognize the interconnectedness of their dreams and the love that fuels their journey.
In this space, individuals discover that love is not only an emotion but a dynamic force that propels them towards their dreams. The love for what they do, the love for the journey, and the love for the people around them become driving factors in overcoming challenges and embracing growth.
Overcoming Perceived Impossibilities:
Arany’s quote suggests that impossibilities dissolve in the face of dreams and love. Coaches often encounter clients who grapple with thoughts of self-doubt and limiting beliefs, perceiving certain goals as unattainable. As a coach, is this something that you have seen in real life?
Dreams instill the belief that the impossible is merely a stepping stone to the extraordinary. Love, on the other hand, provides the emotional resilience needed to navigate the uncertainties and setbacks that can crop up. Together, dreams and love empower individuals to overcome challenges with unwavering determination.
By nurturing the dreams of those we guide and fostering a culture of loving themselves, I think it is one way to pave the way for transformative personal development and helps find the keys to unlocking the best versions of ourselves.
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.
As an experienced coach and trainer Jen is happy to utilise all skills at her disposal to assist clients from getting out of their own way and making a difference in the world with their coaching. Find out more about the support Jen provides here.
“When someone you love becomes a memory, the memory becomes a treasure.”
(Author Unknown)
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