fear

Temptation or Intuition? Guiding Clients to Discern the Difference

 in quote  tagged coach / coaches / coaching / fear / hope / inner wisdom / intuition / quote / temptation / thomas fuller
A close-up shot of a shiny, red apple, perhaps partially obscured by a leaf. The apple is positioned against a dark, mysterious background to create a sense of intrigue with dramatic lighting. The text reads "All temptations are founded either in Hope or Fear." (Thomas Fuller)

The quote of the day is:

“All Temptations Are Founded Either in Hope or Fear” (Thomas Fuller)

Thomas Fuller (1608–1661) was an English historian and clergyman known for his wit and wisdom. His writings often reflect deep insights into human nature, making this quote particularly relevant for coaching conversations.

Temptation is a compelling force, often urging action before we’ve had time to reflect. Thomas Fuller’s observation highlights how hope and fear shape our decisions. As coaches, we frequently encounter clients caught between these forces—unsure whether their next move is a genuine step forward or a reaction driven by fear. How can we help them distinguish between an intuitive nudge and a fear-fuelled temptation?

Recognizing the Voice of Intuition

Intuition often feels like a calm, quiet sense of knowing. It doesn’t demand action, but gently encourages it. In contrast, fear-driven temptation tends to feel urgent and overwhelming, pushing clients toward decisions misaligned with their deeper values. Coaches can help clients pause and explore their inner dialogue.

Key Questions to Ask:

  • How does this decision feel in your body? Calm or tense?
  • If fear wasn’t a factor, would you still choose this path?
  • What would happen if you waited a little longer before acting?

These questions help clients differentiate between impulsive reactions and thoughtful, intuitive responses.

The Role of Hope

Hope is a powerful motivator but can sometimes be mistaken for wishful thinking. When driven by hope, clients often feel expansive and motivated. Yet hope can also lead to temptations that aim to escape discomfort rather than pursue meaningful growth.

Exploring Hope with Clients:

  • What future are you envisioning? Does it align with who you’re becoming?
  • Are you pursuing this path because it excites you or feels like the only option?
  • How does this hope connect to what you would love?

When grounded in purpose, hope can inspire courageous action. When fuelled by avoiding pain, it may divert clients from what truly matters.

The Fear Trap

Fear often disguises itself as practicality or necessity, insisting that clients “must” act now to avoid loss. Recognising this pattern is crucial for breaking free from fear-driven decisions.

Strategies to Uncover Fear:

  • Encourage clients to name their fears. What’s the worst that could happen?
  • Consider the long-term impact. Will this choice still matter in a year?
  • Explore alternative perspectives. Could fear be clouding judgment?

When clients acknowledge their fearful thinking, they often find clarity and courage on the other side.

Intuition as a Guide

A common outcome I see in coaching is clients learning to recognise and trust their inner wisdom. Intuition is a gift available to all of us. By distinguishing between hope, fear, and intuition, clients make choices with greater confidence and authenticity.

Final Reflection

Temptation often disguises itself as urgency, practicality, or even hope, making it difficult to discern from genuine intuition. Helping clients navigate this distinction can be transformative. By guiding them to pause, reflect, and listen to their inner wisdom, we empower them to make choices rooted in clarity and authenticity.

How do you guide clients to distinguish between intuitive nudges and fear-driven temptations? Is this distinction relevant in your coaching practice? I believe this question can spark rich conversations, helping clients tune into their deeper knowing, you guide them beyond the pull of hope or fear and toward their true path.

About Jen Waller

Jen Waller

Jen Waller is a transformative coach dedicated to empowering individuals to get out of their own way and make a meaningful impact in the world.

If this post has intrigued you or sparked questions about distinguishing between fear, hope, and intuition in your decisions, Jen offers a supportive space to explore these insights further. Connect with her to discover how transformative coaching can guide you toward clarity, confidence, and empowered choices

Discover how Jen can support you to get out of your own way here.

Don’t Fail to Try: The Cost of Missed Opportunities

 in quote  tagged coach / coaches / coaching / fail / failure / fear / quote
To try and fail is at least to learn to fail to try is to suffer the inestimable loss of what might have been. Chester Barnard 600 x 400

The quote of the day is:

“To try and fail is at least to learn; to fail to try is to suffer the inestimable loss of what might have been.” (Chester Barnard)

Chester Barnard was an American business executive and author from the first half of the 20th century. As a coach you have probably, either experienced for yourself or seen in your clients an inertia because of a fear of something not working out so no action is taken unless success is guaranteed.

Many people have at least one topic which seems very serious to them, which means they feel they need to be extra cautious – business and money are two common ones. Every decision is meticulously planned, risks are calculated to the smallest detail, and actions are only taken when every step has been considered—sometimes in triplicate. This approach seems rooted in common sense, emphasising logic and practicalities in the real world.

However, sometimes this meticulous planning becomes a barrier rather than a bridge. People find themselves stuck, unwilling to take any physical action unless they are 100% certain that everything will go smoothly without any unforeseen circumstances arising. But here’s the thing: life happens. Unforeseen circumstances are a part of any journey, and encountering them doesn’t mean the whole project is a failure—unless you decide to stop and give up entirely.

Yet there are others who in these areas do not approach those same topics in that manner. They may put something in place to mitigate anything that potentially won’t go to plan, but that doesn’t stop them taking any action. They may take it one step at a time and evaluate as they progress – allowing for learning to happen and things to be seen that wouldn’t have been evident if no action had been taken.

In my experience, life “lifes”! It’s a whimsical way of saying that life is unpredictable and ever-changing. No matter how much we plan, there’s always an element of the unknown. And that’s okay. It’s in these unexpected moments that we often find opportunities for growth and learning.

The fear of failure can be paralysing. It can prevent us from seizing opportunities that could lead to significant advancements, both personally and professionally. Chester Barnard’s quote reminds us that even in failure, there is value. To try and fail is to learn; it’s a step forward, not a step back. On the other hand, failing to try is an immeasurable loss—the loss of potential experiences, growth, and achievements that might have been.

So, how can we move past this fear and embrace the possibility of failure as a learning opportunity? Here are some things to consider:

Embracing the Journey Over the Destination

Firstly, it’s essential to shift our focus from the outcome to the process. When we concentrate solely on the end result, we miss out on the valuable experiences that come with the journey. Each step, each misstep, teaches us something new.

Redefining Failure

Consider redefining what failure means to you. Instead of seeing it as a negative endpoint, view it as a feedback mechanism. Failure isn’t a brick wall; it’s a stepping stone. Thomas Edison famously said about his attempts to create the lightbulb, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”

I remember tweeting that quote, when this blog used to be on what was Twitter, and someone responding with if they’d been Edison’s boss they’d have sacked him long before. I did point out that (a) he discovered several things in the process, such as the electric battery, (b) I don’t know of many inventions that don’t go through many stages of testing and refining, that just seems to be a standard process, and (c) how short-sighted to then miss out on Edison’s electric light bulb just because you thought the process should have taken less time.

Taking Calculated Risks

While it’s important to plan and prepare, recognise that not every variable can be controlled. Taking calculated risks means making informed decisions but also being open to possibilities beyond our control. It’s about finding a balance between caution and courage.

Learning to Adapt

Adaptability is a crucial skill in today’s fast-paced world. When unforeseen circumstances arise, being flexible allows us to adjust our plans without abandoning our goals. It’s about bending without breaking. I’m certain that there are many instances in your own lifetime when you have had to adapt to unforeseen circumstances beyond your control – whether they were ones happening on a global level or had a much smaller reach, but just as significant, on a personal level.

Cultivating Resilience

What do you think about Resilience? Taking resilience to mean the ability to recover quickly from difficulties. If you know that within you, you are much stronger than you imagine, then does the idea of resilience seem easier as well? It’s not about avoiding challenges but facing them head-on and learning from them, maybe even bouncing back stronger. Each challenge overcome adds to our learning, and can be said to be preparing us for future obstacles to seem easier to navigate.

Seeking Support and Collaboration

Don’t underestimate the power of a support system. Sharing our goals and fears with others can provide new perspectives and encouragement. I know in theory as a coach our work would suggest this is a core belief for us. However, when was the last time you made time to make use of that for yourself? Collaboration can lead to solutions we might not have discovered on our own.

Celebrating Small Wins

Acknowledge and celebrate the small victories along the way. These moments of success boost confidence and motivate us to keep moving forward.

In conclusion, the real loss lies not in trying and failing, but in not trying at all. Each attempt, whether successful or not, brings us closer to our goals and helps us grow. So take that first step, embrace the uncertainties, and remember that every experience contributes to your journey.

Reflective Questions:

  • Have you ever held back from pursuing something due to fear of failure?
  • What steps can you take to move past that fear and take action?
  • How can embracing failure as a learning opportunity change your perspective?

I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences related to this topic. Feel free to share them in the comments below.

About Jen Waller

Jen Waller

Jen Waller is a transformative coach dedicated to empowering individuals to get out of their own way and make a meaningful impact in the world. With an impactful, nurturing coaching style, Jen supports clients in unlocking their potential and achieving their goals. As an experienced coach and trainer, she guides clients from self-doubt to success.

Discover how Jen can support you to get out of your own way here.

Does This Fear Inhibit Your Business?

 in Guest Post  tagged Adele Michal / business growth / clients / confidence / fear / fulfillment / good enough / letting go / mindset / money

In this weeks guest post Adele Michal shares some of her experience and knowledge gained from working with women entrepreneurs.

Does This Fear Inhibit Your Business?

By Adele Michal

"Does This Fear Inhibit Your Business?" by Adele Michal

Do you ever wonder why so many mission-driven entrepreneurs find getting really clear on what they offer and how to talk about it to prospective clients so difficult?

FEAR plagues many women entrepreneurs who want to make a difference. Fear has many faces. I’ll talk about several of them here in the next few weeks.

Naming fears and clearing them out of your system is the BEST WAY for you to get clear on what services you offer in your business so that you develop ease enrolling your ideal clients.

Let’s talk about one fear that may be affecting you and your business without your knowing it so that you can address and change it.

The FEAR of doing it WRONG!

If you are like most women in business, you fear:

  • messing up,
  • not being perfect, and
  • not knowing how to respond to a new situation or challenge.

Many men do not have this fear and in fact, are quite confident that they can do things they’ve never done before or been trained to do.

In contrast, many very capable women resist trying something new and instead seek another certification or more training so they are sure to be able to handle what might come up.

As you can imagine, fear of doing “it” wrong keeps many service-based entrepreneurs from getting clear on exactly what they offer, how it benefits their clients, and how valuable it is.

Many of us were raised to be “good girls” and want to please the people who are important to us. Caring about others is what we do as women, but in business we can carry it too far.

Let’s look at a way to address the Fear of Doing It Wrong:

Ask yourself where in your business and offerings you are trying to please someone besides yourself.

  • Do you discount your prices?
  • Do you stay unclear about your services and offers so that no one knows exactly what you do?
  • Do you do too many trades or complimentary sessions?

(** See my note below)

Behind all of these actions is a fear of not pleasing someone who matters to you. Ask yourself:

question mark smallWho is that person?

question mark smallWhat would s/he say if you tried something new or bold?

question mark smallHow would s/he respond if you did something wrong?

As you come up with your answers to these questions, imagine a different response than fear.

question mark smallCould you laugh at yourself for thinking that anyone would really want less than the best for you?

question mark smallCan you release some of the fear by breathing it out and give yourself some freedom to move forward another step?

question mark smallHow about giving yourself a Free Pass from Perfection for the next 30 days? Intend to do it wrong. Let yourself learn. You can perfect it later and the world will not fall apart.

It is critical to you and your business that you name, face, and disable your fear of Doing It Wrong. If you’re not clearly sharing your work and gifts with the people you are meant to help, they cannot get the benefit of working with you. And that is a shame.

Life and business are messy. There’s no such thing as perfection. Doing is better than perfect. We’ll all survive if you don’t get it right this time. Next time you’ll know how to make it better.

I invite you to disengage from your Fear of Doing It Wrong this month. Please let me know how it goes for you. You may be surprised at how much you like the freedom to learn by doing.

** When you’re first starting your practice or service business, it’s good to do a few no cost or low-cost sessions to get experience and clarity about who you like to work with. It’s also sometimes appropriate to do a trade with someone whose work you really value and want. And it’s surely good to give pro-bono work to someone who can’t afford your fees at this time.

But if you are not charging, not charging enough, or doing a lot of trades, you are sabotaging your business, not giving your clients an opportunity to invest in themselves, and telling yourself subconsciously that what you do is not valuable.

This is a dangerous trend and does not serve you or your clients. Look at what you are afraid of and summon up the courage to face it. I promise it will be rewarding.

About Adele Michal

Adele MichalAdele Michal helps entrepreneurs and small business owners help more people and make more money by teaching them how to sell authentically instead fearing sales.

Adele is the creator of Peak State Selling™ Process. She works with individual clients and leads training courses on Selling Without Fear™. She focuses her work on helping her clients enhance their performance in authentic selling by using simple mind/body practices that create confidence, certainty, and charisma in every situation.

To receive Adele’s Free Gift, End Your Money Worries: 3 Simple Steps to Stop Squashing Your Income & Start Making More Money! go to www.womenmakemoremoney.com/gift

 

Article Source:Does This Fear Inhibit Your Business?

Article expert page: Adele Michal

Mindset Secrets to Successfully Selling Premium Coaching Packages

 in Guest Post  tagged boundary / client attraction / clients / coaching / codependency / fear / high end / Ling Wong / marketing / mindset / package / preconception / program / self-worth / selling / value

In this week’s guest post Ling Wong uses her expertise and knowledge as she shares:

Mindset Secrets to Successfully Selling Premium Coaching Packages

By ling wong

"Mindset Secrets to Successfully Selling Premium Coaching Packages" by Ling Wong

A lot of business trainings tell us to sell coaching packages instead of single sessions, and raise our fees while we are at it so we can earn more, work less and have more energy to deliver our best services to our clients. Some of these trainings probably showed you how to design a program and price it.

Sounds good in theory, but… let me ask you – how much are your clients actually paying you? Do you consider the amount you are paid “premium”? (hmm, can you take just one or two new clients a month to pay the bills and more?)

Maybe you have a premium package sitting somewhere on your website, but you somehow have never been paid a “premium” fee; or you revert back to selling the “old” lower-cost packages when the rubber meets the road, i.e. during your sales conversation, because fears and doubts creep in and you chicken out.

If you (intellectually) know offering a premium package is better for your business, and you also have the knowledge to create the package – why aren’t you selling it? Where is the disconnect?

YOU, hold the answer. It’s all in your head.

Everything can sound good on paper, until it comes time to ask for the money.

There are a lot of fears, pre/misconceptions and judgments around “selling”, self-worth and value. Until you bust through these mindset hurdles, you will never feel completely comfortable during a sales conversation.

Your comfort level in asking to get paid is proportional to how much you ultimately get paid.

Preconception

Nobody likes being pushed into buying, and we may perceive people selling to be “bad” because some salesperson gave us bad experience. If you had bad experience with sales people, it is easy to equate selling as “dishonest,” and who wants to be perceived as such? Of course you don’t want to, so you hold back from selling.

Plus, there are many unfavorable images we associate with people doing selling – e.g. the used car salesman, the late-night infomercial dude, even that pushy MLM friend who won’t let you off the hook until you reluctantly sign up for stuff that you don’t want.

What if I tell you, selling = serving? What if you can serve your potential clients while you sell them your services? Educational marketing is a great example. You give people information and provide value to raise awareness about a problem. When they understand the problem they have actually has a solution and you, standing right there, provides that service – they will want to seek you out without you pushing your wares.

I sign a lot more clients after I changed my approach in my discovery sessions from constantly worrying about “what can I say or ask to get them to buy my stuff?” to “what questions can I ask to help this person see a solution to her challenges?” This change in attitude can give the energy behind sales conversations a major overhaul.

QuestionHow can you lead your potential clients into exploring working with you by serving them?

Fears

What kind of selling works? Genuine selling. The kind that you don’t hide behind scripts and templates. The kind that you put yourself forward and connect with your potential clients. But our fears are making us hide… instead of making the connection so critical to getting “yes” from potential clients.

The Fear of Not Being Good Enough can make you feel that you, being yourself, are not enough. It makes you feel there gotta be a script that holds the key to the perfect sales conversation. Maybe you fear that you don’t know enough so you keep babbling on about what you know and where you were trained… completely negating the potential client (who just wants to be heard and be given a damn solution!)

Don’t forget that little voice in your head that keeps saying “who are you to ask for that much money?”

The Fear of Not Being Worthy can cause you to confuse “self-worth” to what people are paying you for – i.e. our services that will give them results. When you don’t feel worthy of being paid, guess what… you don’t get paid!

The Fear of Lack can make you discount or settle for the client purchasing a smaller package even though you know she needs something more extensive because you don’t want to end up with nothing! By settling for less, at least you get the client to pay you something… (note how this makes you come from a place of lack, and not one of service)

The Fear of Being Vulnerable can get you to puff up as a protective mechanism, setting up a wall that prevents you from deeply connecting with your potential clients (people buy high-ticket items with emotions, you need to make that connection). Or, maybe you are afraid of being criticized so you hide from having conversations with potential clients or JV partners. If you hide, they can’t find you!

The Fear of Rejection can make you not ask for more money under the misconception that you will get more “no’s” if your price is higher. If you have this fear, the problem is not the price, the problem is you not having figured out how to communicate the value you deliver.

Question

Can you recognize when you fears kick in during your sales conversations?

Boundary and Codependency

In this article, I explored money boundary and codependency extensively. Here is the highlight:

  • If you are undercharging and not asking for a “premium price,” you may feel that you need to give everyone access to your service and you have the limiting belief or misconception that you can “help more people” by charging less. (You are trying to give everyone your stuff whether they want it or not – and this, is a violation of the other person’s boundary.)
  • If you are over-delivering (e.g. going overtime during your sessions, writing pages after pages of support emails, “throwing in” extras), essentially giving “premium” services without being compensated for it, you may be feeling responsible for your clients’ results even though they need to do the work to succeed. Because you feel responsible, you would bend over backwards – compromising your own boundaries in order to “help” that person with the misconception that somehow, you can do the work for your client (By the way, the client may or may not want to be helped, so in a way, you are violating that her personal choice.)
  • If you have been constantly discounting, you may be buying into the client’s money stories and somehow made felt responsible that your fee will turn into the cause of her distress so you discount to make yourself feel better. (By the way, you have no rights to decided for the other person what she can or cannot afford… it’s her priority and her decisions to make.)
  • If you have been giving away services for free – STOP! This is martyr mentality stemming from a fear of not being worthy (you are trying to prove to yourself that you are) and can turn into victimhood that kicks you off the driver’s seat altogether.

When your boundary is overstepped, it is you who allows that to happen.

QuestionIf it’s your boundary crime to commit, can you recognize your triggers and “rehearse” what you can do or say in those situations?

Self-Worth vs the Value of Your Program

I have a bone with the phrase “charge what you are worth” – I explained it in this post.

If you can separate your self-worth from the value you deliver through your program, then the question “how can my time be worth that much” will not even enter the equation.

Focus on the value your clients get out of your program or service package, not how much time you spend on the phone with them.

If they get a more out of your service than what they pay you, then offering them your package is doing them a service. The key, again, is to communicate effectively so they understand the value of your program, and the impact it has on their lives.

ExerciseWrite down how your work impacts your clients in the areas of health, career, finance, relationship and personal growth. Then put a monetary value (wherever possible) against each item. Now, add it all up and see for yourself how much value you deliver. Can you charge more?

***

Selling, and selling high-ticket items, is not scary. You can sell more with integrity by having the right mindset and perspective, overcoming your fears, strengthening your boundaries, and properly communicating the value of your offer.

About Ling Wong

Ling offers “Business Soulwork + Marketing Activation” to help coaches nail their Messages, claim their Superpowers and muster up the Guts to monetize their Truth so they can build a purposeful and profitable Personality-Driven business that is a full expression of their individuality and creativity.

Through her “left brain meets right brain” approach, Ling helps her clients tap into their intuition and ground those light bulb moments with practical strategies and marketing tactics to build a profitable and sustainable business.

Ready to Nail Your Message, Claim Your Superpowers and Monetize Your Truth for a Personality-Driven business? Get your FREE “Monetize Your Truth Mindset + Marketing Training” here.