esteem


Coaching resources 1

You may find that as a coach that you refer to the term resources. Today’s post is going to discuss resources in more detail.

Starting with, what is a resource?

Looking up a dictionary definition gives:

Resource noun 1. something to which one can turn for help or support or to achieve one’s purpose.

2. a means of relaxation or amusement

3. ingenuity, quick wit

4. (resources) available assets; we pooled our resources

5. (resources) a source of wealth to a country; natural resources such as minerals

For anyone interested in the historical origins of the word resource, “means of supplying a want or deficiency” can be traced back to 1610’s from a Latin word meaning “rise again.” However, it wasn’t until 1779 that it was first recorded to mean a country’s wealth.

As a coach I often find that when I talk with a client about resources their answers can fall into one of two different categories. You can see it hinted at within the dictionary definition.

One category is Internal resources, those aspects that the client has within themselves to support them to achieve their purpose. The other one being external resources, the external support that relates to the “outside world”.

If a client is stuck than the solution can easily be an internal or external resource depending upon the situation. However, there are some resources that as a coach I may explore in more depth early on.

There are many Internal resources, beliefs, attitudes, emotional states etc that we, as humans, build upon. One of the first internal resources I often check for is desire. It’s one of those resources that when missing is really noticeable.

If you haven’t noticed this for yourself already, I invite you to consider for yourself your own previous experiences and maybe even observe it’s impact in future coaching conversations.

External support can take many different forms family, friends, colleagues, time, space, money, are all examples of external resources.

Often questioning can revel opportunities that have been missed or underused – and just imagine what discovering those resources can mean to the progress that can be made.

As you’ve read this you may already have noticed that internal and external categories can sometimes, at least in the clients mind, affect each other. For example, a client may have a belief (an internal resource) about an external support.

I mention the distinction between the two categories not because I think that they should be separate. I offer this purely as yet another resource for you to “rise again” (to use it’s origins) when you need to use it to assist your clients to achieve their purpose.

 

 


Are you a coach that cares? 2

In a previous coaching post I’ve talked about what a coach can do to prepare for a coaching session. Each coach will develop their own answers and preparation for a coaching session.

As I shared in that previous post I look to answer the following before a coaching session “What can I do to ensure that I show up brilliantly?”

I know that doing “my job” as a coach to the best of my abilities and showing up brilliantly is much easier when I have taken care of myself. Today’s coaching post discusses self-care. As you read I invite you to consider how this works with your approach to coaching.

Let’s start by discussing what I mean by self-care. I once did a web search on the term self care and came across the following:

“Self care skills are the needs to manage day to day life. They include washing, dressing, cooking and housekeeping.”

Admittedly this was in reference to caring for someone else, and those things do all fall under self-care, and in this instance I am talking about much more than physiological need.

You may have seen Maslow’s hierarchy of needs usually represented as a pyramid, with the largest and lowest level of needs forming the foundations for the others to build upon. This theory of needs was proposed by psychologist Abraham Maslow in the 1940′s and 50′s.

There is debate about the order that the levels are placed in, or even if there is a hierarchy at all. Rather than get involved in that discussion, I’m going to use it as a catalyst for thought. I’ll invite you to glance at the following synopsis and consider the emotional, physical and even spiritual effects and benefits that taking care of your needs for each category would have.

Physiological – What we, as humans, literally require to survive as a species. Needs that are seen to fall in this category include food, breathing, sleep and sexual activity.

Safety – In today’s society this does not only mean physical safety but can also include employment/financial security, health and security of property etc.

Love and Belonging – This category of “needs” covers aspects of feelings of belonging and building relationships, such as friendship, family and romantic.

Esteem – This heading covers needs such as self-esteem, confidence and respect – both of and by others.

Self-Actualisation – This, Maslow theorised, is the top of the pyramid, and is the section that covers what a persons potential is and fulfilling that potential. Dr Wayne Dyer describes it as:

i) To be free of the good opinion of others,

ii) To do things not simply for the outcome but because it’s the reason you are here on earth.

I include these not because I necessarily agree with every single aspect of Maslow’s theory myself, but to encourage a broader look at the things that when you take care to include in your daily routine you feel more alive and generally have a better day.

I’ll let you decide for yourself if taking care of yourself is something that would benefit your coaching.

If you want to play further with this:

What are the things that when you do them, you have a better day?

What are the things that when you do them you feel more alive and are more productive?

What would the difference be if you deliberately and consciously chose to incorporate more of these into your day?