Powerful coaching questions

by Jen Waller

When readers sign up to get the weekly blog recap email there’s the option to share what they would like to read more about. The topic of questions is something that gets a mention – which is why if you browse through previous posts you’ll find posts such as: Questions, Questions, Questions, How to ask hard questions, and guest posts such as Frederique Murphy’s 5 Questions To Ask When Silence Sets In

As coaches we use questions a lot. It’s one of our basic tools, a fundamental aspect of what most coaches understand coaching to involve. I know it can get a bit more complicated when it comes to certain types of coaching, for example with some sports coaching. But for the purposes of this post I’m going to talk about coaching that use questions as part of the core of their approach.

Given this post is called powerful coaching questions, let’s start with a couple of questions about powerful coaching questions. What makes a powerful coaching question and how do you know if a question is powerful?

What makes a powerful coaching question and how do you know if a question is powerful?

At a very simple level my initial answer to what makes a powerful coaching question is that it works for the client you’re working with at that moment. It is a question that opens up a new perspective and insight they hadn’t previously seen. It’s a question where the client suddenly finds an answer to something they’ve spent hours, days, months and even years pondering without success.

So how will you know if you’ve asked a powerful question? Your client will tell you – either directly or with their behaviour. If you get the chance to reflect on your own coaching what do you notice that tells you that a particular question has made an impact? Likewise if you get the chance to observe and listen to someone else coach, what did you notice then that told you that a question had made an impact?

I’ve seen and heard a variety of different responses that give an indication that a question has landed powerfully – from light hearted swearing at the coach as they realised something that now seemed so obvious through to complete quiet, focusing off into the distance as they get a new insight upon a situation.

And what’s it like to be on the end of such a question? My suggestion here is that if you’ve not experienced powerful coaching questions from the clients perspective and you’re looking to set up a coaching practice then go experience some powerful coaching. It can give you great insight not only into what you’re being coached around but it can also give you an understanding that will help you when you set up your own practice.

Personally, I’ve been on the receiving end of powerful questions and had a variety of responses on different occasions I’ve had a giggling fit at something that seemed such an obstacle moments before suddenly just seemed funny to look at as something that needed to be solved, I’ve also felt a complete fool at times for not seeing a now obvious answer sooner. Then there’s been the times where after a thought a light bulb moment happens. Not forgetting total disorientation and speechlessness as whole perceptions are shattered.

Those are just some examples of responses and I’m sure you’ll be able to think of others and very specific things that you notice. I’ll also take a moment to bring your attention to the different responses, next question, action etc that you think would be appropriate depending upon your clients reaction following a powerful question landing.

Crafting powerful coaching questions that are just for your client

So how do you craft a powerful coaching question that’s unique to your client? That answer will partly depend upon your own approach to coaching – I’ve seen powerful questions that have been asked because the coach has based it upon a specific coaching model or technique. For example, it may be a question that fits into one of the sections in the well known coaching models GROW or crafted based on the structure of a specific style of questioning.

It’s one that resonates with that person and how they saw and connected to the subject. This means that some really powerful questions can come from building upon previous question and answers. The previous answers allowing the question that “hits home” to be worded specifically and deliberately taking that clients language, beliefs, motivation, what they’ve not seen etc into consideration.

Then there’s questions which are based upon common traits, misunderstandings, limiting beliefs or stumbling blocks, etc. These may be worded specifically that just being human could be enough for it to resonate with you. Other times it may be something very specific you’ve noticed about your niche perhaps specific to the clients that are attracted to the way you work.

So for example,

If you won the lottery tomorrow, so money is no problem, what would you do?

Is a question that many can respond to as beliefs around money are fairly common, at least in the western world.

If you were really OK with not asking a powerful coaching question, what coaching questions would occur to you?

Is a question that whilst having a similar structure is tailored to a specific common underlying belief about what a coaching session with a “real” coach should be like (ie they potentially think that powerful coaching means every question hits home and every second of every session must be “perfect” for a client to get any value at all.)

Then there are the questions that seem to come out of no-where. The ones where you’re in the flow and the question seem to turn up fully formed. Now some will say this is down to experience and having mastered a skill so you no longer have to deeply consider forming a question and you’ve picked up on something without giving it much thought. Others will say that this is when “you” just gets out the way and something bigger is at work.

If you’ve experienced that for yourself I’m sure you’ll have your own theories about what is happening, your whole coaching approach may even be based upon your answer to this. I’m not going to say either way is right or wrong. What I will say is that I’ve personally learned to trust those questions that turn up so fully formed and it occurs to me to ask the question.

This is a topic which I’m sure will be revisited on the blog again but for now let me leave you with some questions:

 What does powerful coaching mean to you?
 How would you know if you were asking powerful questions? Would your answer be different if you coached via a different medium? ie face to face/ phone/ video call/ purely by email.
 What questions do you think are powerful?
 What question do you hope I don’t ask you now?
 What action can you take now having spent some time considering questions?

Feel free to share your answers in the comment section below or if you’d prefer to share them privately just with myself email me

About Jen Waller

Jen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.

As an experienced coach and trainer Jen is happy to utilise all skills at her disposal to assist clients from getting out of their own way and making a difference in the world with their coaching. One of the aspects of her role Jen loves the most is seeing individuals find their voice, grow their confidence and take the next steps. This allows them to make a massive positive impact and difference with their coaching. (For more info about Jen’s coaching click here) Jen has owned and run Coaching Confidence, the coaching blog since 2010.

In her spare time Jen is a volunteer for the UK based charity The Cinnamon Trust. This charity supports elderly and terminally ill pet owners to provide care for their pets. As a volunteer, Jen regularly walks dogs for owners who physically often find that more challenging then they once did. As a pet owner herself, Jen finds it really rewarding to be able to assist an owner stay with an animal that has become part of the family. (Plus it’s a great additional motivator when working from home to get out and get some fresh air and exercise)

Jen also loves theatre and has been known to watch certain popular science fiction films and TV shows!