past
Coaching Quote of the Day 27th March 2013
“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.”
(Ralph Waldo Emerson)
The Power of Using Timelines
Lawrence Michaels shares a technique in today’s guest post:
The Power of Using Timelines
by Lawrence Michaels
I first came across using a timeline as a form of therapeutic and coaching intervention when I studied my NLP practitioner course a number of years ago. Since my training as a Hypnotherapist I frequently use the timeline approach with my clients, both as a powerful way of resolving past issues which are impacting on their life today and to re-access and utilise past or current resources and strengths, to help them in the present and future.
To be clear at this point I haven’t had any training in the similar Timeline Therapy approach and so am writing based on my own experience of using timelines in the context of NLP and Hypnotherapy.
The Timeline in a nutshell
So, for me, using a timeline in it’s simplest form means asking a client to establish a metaphorical line that represents their past, present and future, which they create in their mind, typically when in a trance state. This means I can easily guide them to revisit different times in their past and to create a preferred future scenario. What I find particularly effective when using this approach is the combination of disassociation and association when dipping in to different events and times in their life, so they see and experience these situations from different perspectives. Also the actual disassociation created by the timeline itself is particularly helpful when revisiting traumatic past events.
Preparation
Typically before using a timeline technique with a client I already have a good idea of how I am going to use it to help them, either by knowing which past events need to be resolved or which resources I want to access. However the beauty of this approach is that if the client is stuck, or just not able to identify or discuss specific areas of their life with me, we can wait until we use the timeline to help them do that, without the client needing to disclose any detail.
Anchoring the client
So I start by anchoring the client in a safe, secure and comfortable place using lots of sensory focus so they create this special place in their mind, as a place to go to at any point in our work together. This is of course a form of hypnotic induction, bringing a light trance state. This anchor is helpful both as a positive resourceful state they can easily re-access and also to use as a transition between visiting different points on their timeline.
Working on the Timeline
As far as the actual work on the timeline; My role is to guide them along their timeline, visiting different events and experiences where I can then utilise the relevant intervention technique or approach. This includes allowing the client in their adult state to pass on guidance and support and wisdom to their younger selves, before allowing them to experience an old event in a different way with these new resources in place. By setting up a simple hand signal the client is also able to communicate to me without breaking their trance state and let me know how they are doing. I always then have the option of taking them back to their comfortable place should it be needed. It’s so satisfying to utilse the clients resources and strengths and work with their creativity so that together we come up with some really helpful solutions. It is also a chance for the client to see their past in a new light and recognise the positive intentions that they and others had, that may not have been apparent before.
Finally I future pace the client and allow them to have a vivid positive experience of themselves in a situation that previously would have had negative past associations. Of course being creative and respectful with how to use the clients own resources and life experience is important, and quite often new ways of working come up as we are using this timeline approach that are tailored to them.
About the author
After his interest in NLP was sparked from taking a workshop in 2004, Lawrence passed his NLP Practitioner and then in 2008 completed his Diploma in Hypnotherapy which included the Human Givens Psychotherapy approach. Based in Brighton UK Lawrence now specialises in helping clients with anxiety related concerns as well as seeing clients in other areas such as weight loss and Sports Performance. His website and blog is www.lawrencemichaels.co.uk and he can also be contacted there. He is also on Twitter (https://twitter.com/LawrenceHypno) and Facebook (http://www.facebook.com/lawrencemichaelshypnotherapy) too.
Coaching Quote of the Day 26th August 2012
“Things that I felt absolutely sure of but a few years ago, I do not believe now. This thought makes me see more clearly how foolish it would be to expect all men to agree with me.”
(Jim Rohn)
Coaching Quote of the Day 21st July 2012
“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.”
(Paul Boese)
Coaching Quote of the Day 11th July 2012
“Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.”
(Anon)
Balancing the Push and Pull of Life
In today’s guest post Andrew A. Faccone draws upon his own life experiences and his coaching expertise to share 3 points around life, commitment and time.
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Balancing the Push and Pull of Life ..
“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.”
(Albert Einstein)
We are all given 24 hours a day, 1,440 minutes per day and 86,400 seconds per day to use how we see fit.
Those of us reading this post are very fortunate and blessed to choose how we are to use that precious time we are given. That allotted time has a short life span, it must be used immediately and it cannot be carried over. If it is not used properly it expires.
It is our choice to maximize or minimize how we allocate our days, weeks, months and years that we are given in our lifetime. The mystery of life reveals that life is not a straight line, there is no instruction booklet on how to live and we are responsible for our actions.
The attention that we pay to the little things throughout life has a dramatic effect on the outcomes of our life as we progress and mature throughout our lifetime. Since our birth we have all pursued different paths, we have learned, prospered, been knocked down and despite the challenging conditions have succeeded as well as failed in some of our endeavors. The challenges have made us stronger and the shortcomings have taught us what not to repeat in the future. In some cases we are all learning from those shortcomings.
Past events somehow always re-appear at various times throughout our lives. In the time of our youth we pursued our education and the playful desires of our youth. Academics, athletics, music, literature, sciences, religious education, play time with our childhood friends, youth and civic groups, participation with a strong supervision from our families who attended those important life events. They cheered us on in victory and comforted us when the results did not materialize as hoped for.
When our formal education ended we then used our educational backgrounds or God given talents to find a way to make a go of it on our own. Welcome to being a grown up! We now face the commitments of professional life, parenthood, earning a living, providing for our families, advancing our professional careers and now we have become those attendees routing for our family members as they progress through their childhood and young adult activities that we participated in in the not so distant past.
Where is the person who wanted to change the world and make the difference in the world?
Is this life still a life in balance? Is there equal push and pull in our daily activities? Finding that balance, the constant struggle that addresses all of the aspects of our lives. Spirituality, physicality, and mentality.
I am asked many times in all of my personal & professional travels how did I get where I am in life? I have some of the answers to this question and some answers I do not have. I have been blessed to have had some extraordinary people that have been a part of my life. Nine years of a disciplined Catholic school education, athletic participation in high school and college, a loving family along with several key family members who taught me about the true lessons of life and that I can do anything that I set myself to attaining.
I try to rely on 3 key points and try to use them as my daily guide as I try to find a balance between the many commitments I am involved with in my daily life both personally and professionally.
What you say will determine what you will become. I have always been a believer in word affirmations. The words you are projecting will impact your individual outcomes. If you’re not projecting positive words and expecting great things to occur, they will not happen. If you don’t believe something will happen nobody else will. Use those empowering words to get you to where you want to be.
- Control The Controllables is the most important piece of our lives’ direction. We cannot control other people or the actions that they undertake, outside events, or decide the specific outcomes for certain situations. We can only control ourselves and our actions; we are accountable to those actions and decisions that we ourselves make. No one else. Do the best you can to work on those goals both short term and long term, work diligently and constantly change your approach to achieve your goals, but understand you can only control what is in front of you. A strong will can conquer anything, but you also have to be realistic in what you undertake.
- Have a goal & the end point in mind. We all set out many times to undertake certain projects but never have the end goal in mind. Example: I am going on a diet and lose weight. That statement screams starve yourself and constantly not be satisfied with even losing the smallest amount of weight. Give yourself credit for wanting to lose weight and changing your eating habits. Whenever a new habit is introduced to our lives it takes roughly 28 days to form a new habit. You have to give yourself credit and realize that to be successful and create a new habit it takes time. Having the end point in mind, losing 1-2 pounds weekly and trying to exercise on a more regular basis is a realistic goal & plan. It is not where you are it’s the direction that you are headed that counts. Keep that goal of where you want to be ever present in your daily actions. You’ll be surprised what you can attain.
- Enjoy the journey Life is full of surprises, challenges, and lot of unexpected “things “occur. When life throws the unexpected curve at us daily, which it does to us at some point, we need to readjust and get yourself back on track of the task at hand. Interruptions, issues, something totally unexpected is going to occur. Deal with it quickly and to the best of your ability and get back to what you were you were doing. Once that event has occurred put it in the rear view mirror and move on. Tony Robbins, noted author & motivational speaker, referenced the statement ‘the past does not equal the future’. It is so true. We all need to be aware of this statement and realize that we are doing the best that we can, with the time we have to enjoy each day with its many challenges and surprises.
Life is an attitude -have a good one and you will enjoy the wonderful journey. When you start to make these new adjustments in your daily activities, changes in those daily habits, week after week, month after month, and year after year you will start to recognize that new person in the mirror who you have not seen in some time. Start small but think big, because you can do it, great things are coming your way… it all depends on you!
About the Author/Further Resources
Andrew Faccone, MBA is employed in the healthcare industry as a long term care account specialists in the United States near the New York Metropolitan area. Andrew has over 18 years experience as an athlete,& coach positively impacting the lives of athletes he has coached. Andrew is available for speaking engagements of any size or location and individual coaching sessions.
Contact Andrew A. Faccone at aa****@***oo.com or
Linkedin : http://www.linkedin.com/pub/andrew-a-faccone-mba/24/291/3b2
Cell Phone 732 614 8425 Eastern Time Zone
Background on Image above title via: FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Coaching Quote of the Day 25th January 2012
“Spend eighty percent of your time focusing on the opportunities of tomorrow rather than the problems of yesterday.”
(Brian Tracy)