life coach


Is it history?

This was originally published as a bonus article in the Coaching Confidence weekly email during May 2011. To start getting your very own copy each week enter your details under “Don’t miss a thing!” to the right of this page.

Is it history?

One of the subjects I studied at university was history. There are skills, methods of analysis and approaches that I still use in my day-to-day life which may not be obvious.

There are also other skills and knowledge that I learnt directly from studying that subject which are far more obvious. For example an ongoing project has been researching my own family history – knowing my way round certain historical records is rather helpful for that.

I’m also involved in recording onto databases certain historical records to make them more accessible and easily searchable. Some of these records are hand written, while others may be typed. They are all from a past era in time and it can take some time to become familiar with the language that is being used.

I don’t mean that the records that I’m working on are written in a language other than English – there is just specific terminology that can take some interpretation.

Some documents can be really easy to understand and interpret. Others can take longer as I adjust to someone’s particular handwriting style or the abbreviations they may have been using.

Projects can be a straightforward list of names etc and can be more repetitive in the work needed as well as more superficial with your understanding of the data. Others involve far more involvement.

One of the projects that I recently did was make a record of names that appeared in newspapers. This was an African American paper from the turn of the 20th century and there was a story within one of the pages that recorded disturbances after a mesmerism act had visited town.

It appeared that some of the local youths had learnt some mesmerism skills and had used these for their own amusement. An example of a disturbance was one boy who stood up and shouted in Sunday school every time a particular phrase was used!

I’d be very surprised if at the time the instigator of this act would imagine that in over 100 years time someone would be reading about their exploits and sharing the account with others.

I also wonder if those who had been upset by the situation would still have the same feelings if they were looking back on it from 100 plus years into the future – would it still seem important to them?

As a coach I have seen plenty of clients make use of the benefit of hindsight – both actual and when someone imagines looking back at an event from the future. You may even have guided a client to think of something in the past and seen the difference it made to them.

As an individual I also know that sometimes just taking that step back from a situation, often makes it seem far less significant or scary. It can also put things into a much wider context.

Today I invite you to play with the following:

  1. Pick a situation or scenario that you are currently stuck with or want a new perspective.
  2. Make sure that you are in an environment where it is safe for you to be distracted – for example do not do this when driving a car!
  3. Imagine that you have somehow travelled 100+ years into the future and someone else is reading an account of that situation
  4. From this new perspective, 100 + years into the future, notice what your thoughts are now.
  5. From 100 + years in the future become aware of any advice/action you would share with the you from 2012.
  6. When you are ready bring your attention fully back to 2012, bringing any observations and advice back with you that you want to and is appropriate.

Feel free to take any action you want to with your new perspective.

Love

Jen

About the Author

Jen WallerJen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.

She has created a free 7 day e-course about how to create your own unique coaching welcome pack that works for you and your clients. Get your copy here.


April “From Non-Coach to Coach Discovery Sessions” now available

Are you transitioning, or thinking of moving from being a Non-Coach to a Coach?

Are you uncertain about how you will do that?

One big problem I’ve noticed that many coaches struggle with is the transition between being a non-coach to a coach.

They’re often busy focusing upon what they think they “should” be doing. They either miss the chances to serve (and even profit) from opportunities already waiting for them or they are too scared to take the next step.

I love to be of service to coaches, particularly those who are just starting out on their coaching journey like you! So I’ve created a special 1 hour session to help with this problem, my From Non-Coach to Coach Discovery Session.

Scheduling wise I can only offer a set number of these sessions a month but they are open to all. I’m now taking bookings for April calls.

Your consultation will be laser-focused on 1 thing, and 1 thing only: You becoming the coach you want to be.

You get my expertise, loving strong coaching, AND specific action steps to move you forward quickly. Together, we’ll …

  • Create a crystal-clear vision of exactly what being a coach means for you and how it fits with your business and lifestyle goals.
  • Clarify exactly what’s been holding you back from making that transition to become a coach and why you are not already serving clients.
  • Identify the next action step(s) for you to take so you can easily make that transition from non-coach to coach

I’ll lay out specific action steps for you, and finally, I will make at least one coach’s request to you to get you going. And the best part?

Your 60-minute From Non-Coach to Coach Discovery Session is absolutely FREE

If you are longing to step up, get out there, start getting clients, start making money AND be of greater service to the world …you can see what a tremendous opportunity this is!

The only “catch” is … you have to act fast to get one of this month’s sessions!

To claim one of these FREE sessions, here’s all you need to do:

The first of two steps to booking your from Non-Coach to Coach Discovery session is to answer the questions below.

The second stage is selecting a time that works for us both, once you have submitted your answers you will be directed to a site to book a specific time for our call.

[si-contact-form form=’9′]


Identifying When Clients Need Counseling

In this week’s guest post Coach Toni Knights discusses what she considers to identify when it is necessary to refer clients for additional help.

Identifying When Clients Need Counseling

by Toni Knights

How do you know whether your client needs coaching or counseling? People sometimes come to us under the guise of coaching when they really need therapy/counseling. As coaches, we’ve been told a thousand times over that coaching is not counseling/therapy; but how do we know when our client needs which service?

Dr. Jeffrey E. Auerbach says, “The essential difference most often cited between psychotherapy and coaching is that psychotherapy usually focuses on resolving illness or trauma, whereas coaching focuses on enhancing achievement and fulfillment in a generally well-functioning person.” (Auerbach)

Albeit, whether we have been coaching for one year or twenty years, it is important that we be ever mindful of the differences; and even though coaching and therapy can occur simultaneously, one must not be used to replace the other. Blurred lines can confuse our clients and ultimately would not benefit them. Here are some tips which can help us steer our clients in the right direction:

  • During the first contact, clarify the following:

……………………• Why client thinks you can help.
……………………• Explain what coaching IS and IS NOT.

  • Review the initial coaching questionnaire carefully. The answers given on this form can act as a catalyst for ensuing conversations. (Note the importance of having a detailed initial questionnaire in your welcome package.)
  • Listen for key words/statements during the dialogue which may indicate the client’s understanding of the coaching relationship. His/her answers should cause us to ask ourselves one of two questions – ‘Why does he/she do what he/she does?’ or ‘What life changes does he/she want to make?’ If your question begins with ‘why’ then your client might benefit from therapy. If your question begins with ‘what’, it is safe to conclude that the client is ready for coaching.
  • In order to further confirm your assessment, use tact to find out about:

……………………• Drug use
……………………• Depression or feeling down within the past six months
……………………• History of mental illness in immediate family

As coaches, our helping arsenal should include contact information for myriad professionals including psychologists, therapists and/or counselors [and we must not be afraid to use them]. According to Daniel H. Pink, “It’s the coach’s job to help people clarify, to see through stuff and help them become who they really are.” Although there are many therapists who are also coaches, if you are not a trained mental health professional do not attempt to simultaneously counsel and coach your client. To this end, we must trust our judgment and know when it is necessary to refer our clients for additional help.

About the Author/Further Resources

Toni Knights is a Christian Life Coach who runs the coaching practice “Life In Process.” She also facilitates workshops that focus upon self improvement.

You can read her weekly blog at http://justthinking-knightstoni.blogspot.com.


Marketing and your Ideal Client 1

How to market your coaching is a often requested topic, in today’s guest post coach Cindy Hillsey shares her expertise and knowledge in:

Marketing and your Ideal Client

By Cindy Hillsey

Ideal Client. Target Market. Niche Market. They all mean the same thing, right? Wrong!

And this, I believe, is where the confusion sets in for many business owners. How many times have you read an article, attended a seminar, and/or just had a conversation with someone where all three of these terms are used interchangeably? I’ll bet by now you don’t even hear those words anymore. And if you do, do you really understand what they mean and how they apply to your business? Unless you are clear about what these terms mean for your business, you will more than likely struggle with marketing your business.

I have a number of clients who contact me with what they call ‘marketing problems’. They are having a difficult time filling their practice. During our conversations, I find they don’t really have a marketing problem so much as they have an Ideal Client problem. They are trying to be everything to everyone. When I ask them who their Ideal Client is I am usually given a broad, vague answer such as: women, or women in transition, or Coaches, etc.. While that sounds great, it doesn’t tell me who your Ideal Client is and why she’s ideal.

If you don’t know who you are doing what to, how can you do it? And therein lies the real problem: It’s not about marketing, but about knowing who you are marketing to and why at a deep core level.

Let’s talk a bit more about Target Market, Niche Market, and Ideal Client. These terms do not mean the same thing. Please don’t confuse them as they serve different functions.

Target Market – This is a grouping based on one or more common characteristics. For example, age, sex, location, occupation, product purchases, etc.

Niche – This is primarily an occupational grouping. For example, Sports Channels, Financial Planners, Coaches, CPAs, VAs, etc.

Ideal Client – This is the person (and yes I am going to refer to this as one person even though you will have several of the one person) who you connect with at your core. This is the person you know extremely well, so well, in fact, that you can list their problems as though they were your own problems. You understand their values, desires, beliefs, as well as you understand your own. It is because of this deep understanding that you are able to offer effective solutions and/or guidance to your Ideal Client.

Here’s a visual of the above:

Target market, Niche market and Ideal client by Cindy Hillsey

It is this concept around the Ideal Client that will allow you to address the problems of your Ideal Client, offer solutions to your Ideal Client, and create the content on your website that speaks to your Ideal Client. In turn, this will allow you to market more effectively and easily. Once you know who are doing what to the rest of your marketing becomes easier.

Let’s take a moment and review some essential elements of the Ideal Client:

  • It’s counter-intuitive in the sense that it is most effective when your Ideal Client is highly specific and narrow.
  • When you try to be everything to everybody, you end being nothing to anybody.
  • There is a common center of interest and/or lifestyle of your Ideal Client.
  • Your Ideal Client exists in a sufficient quantity.
  • Your Ideal Client has the ability to pay you.
  • (Hint) Your Ideal Client is really you on some level!

What does having an Ideal Client do for you and your business?

  • An Ideal Client provides you with a clear vision and an obvious focus.
  • It enhances your credibility and your reputation.
  • It increases the demand for your services because of the specialized market.
  • It greatly simplifies marketing and increases your return on investment (ROI).
  • It provides a firm base from which you can expand your business.

So, how do you go about determining who your Ideal Client is? One way I would suggest is for you to write a story about your Ideal Client. Give him/her a name, an education, a family life (single or not), a social life, a business, and write about the problems they have in their business that you can help them solve. Get very detailed. Let me repeat that…get very detailed. I want you to know this person like you know your family!

These questions should help you begin to craft your Ideal Client:

1. What are the basic characteristics of your Ideal Client? (demographics, age, gender, salary, education, location, etc.)

2. Who are your clients? Are they business executives, artists, small business owners, micro business owners?

3. What kind of values does your ideal client have? Do these values match yours?

4. What exactly do your Ideal Clients do? How do they need your help? (Be very specific in your answers to these two questions.)

5. How do your Ideal Clients treat you? Do they pay on time? Do they understand you are a business owner and treat you as such?

Whether you know exactly who your Ideal Client is or not, please take the time to answer the above questions so that the next time you are asked, “Who is your Ideal Client? You can answer them without hesitation!

About the Author/Further Resources

Cindy Hillsey, CPC, ACC, is a Creative Small Business Coach and the owner of Virtual Partnering, based in Grand Rapids, MI. Cindy has an extensive background in small business, both online and offline. By combining her experience, business skills, and her coaching skills, she is able to offer her clients a unique perspective to help them achieve their business goals. She coaches women entrepreneurs who wish to express their creativity through their business by helping them put a solid business foundation in place step-by-step so that they can grow their business while fostering their creativity.

Cindy holds a Bachelor of Science in Management from Davenport University. She is a certified coach through the International Coach Academy. Along with being a member of the International Coach Federation (ICF), she holds the Associate Certified Coach designation through the ICF. In addition, Cindy is currently working on obtaining her Certified Coach designation through the Creativity Coaching Association.

Cindy’s websites:

www.virtualpartnering.com

www.chatsondemand.com

Connect with me:

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/cindyhillsey

Twitter: http://twitter.com/cindyhillsey

LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/cindyhillsey


Using quotes in coaching – remembering them in the first place

In last week’s coaching post I asked “Do you use quotes in your coaching?” In that post I talked about why you may want to use a quote in a coaching session.

I was then asked a great question on twitter about if I had any tips about how to remember quotes. Many potential answers sprang to mind, all longer than the 140 characters I can use in a tweet so today’s coaching post was born. Feel free to add your own method and thoughts at the end of today’s post.

I will share some ways that I personally have used to remember quotes as well as offering some thoughts around this in general. As you read this, I invite you to notice which ones are most appealing to you.

Firstly, don’t presume that you have to remember them word for word to be able to use a quote. I know that may seem an odd place to start in a post about remembering quotes but I think it’s worth pointing out. There are several situations that can let you refer to a written form of the quote.

This may be down to the situation that you are coaching around. I used the example last week of coaching a customer-facing employee in a business where you may choose to quote a specific customer – is that a quote you wrote down at the time of observation, or is it a quote that you have taken from a written piece of feedback etc?

Can you incorporate reading a quote directly? Either from notes you use/take during a session or other methods.

For example, if you coach via the phone, can you pin some quotes within sight to glance at when needed? If you have written the quote down/it’s in a book, could you just reach out from where you are working and grab that so you can read out the quote?

Be prepared. Perhaps your client sent you a completed pre-session preparation/ exercise of some form in advance and a particular quote sprang to mind as you read it. What’s stopping you from having that quote to hand to use in case it’s still relevant when you talk to that client?

Last week I also spoke about using quotes to “borrow authority” to focus your clients attention or increase their willingness to answer a question or do an exercise. It can be used as a convincer to add extra-perceived credibility. If this is an exercise that requires you to print materials, could you add the quote onto the page in advance?

Make use of the strategies you already use when you coach – if you make a point of using the precise language and phrasing that a client uses, how do you do that? How can you use that same approach to use the same precise language and phrasing in a particular quote?

How much attention to quotes are you paying? It’s a lot easier to recognise that you are using quotes if you have acknowledged that they are quotes in the first place. 🙂 It’s also easier to remember to use “a quote” if you have mentally thought of that phrase/saying etc as a quote.

Over the years I have used various methods that have led to me memorising quotes. Some of these methods have been a conscious attempt to easily recall a quote. On other occasions it’s just been a by-product of another event/activity.

Some of the most popular tweets that get shared from this blogs twitter feed come from song lyrics, films and TV. Consider the quotes you already have in your memory.

When I was still in education, one of the ways I revised for my history exams was to learn various quotes to back up various historical perspectives of events. I had turned this into a game – I wrote each quote on it’s own card, the quote on one side and a brief description on the other. I could then use those as a memory aid and just play, often involving repeating what was on the card.

On other occasions I’d use them to play and draw “Pictionary” style representations of the quote that stuck in my memory (often because they just looked ridiculous, after all I was studying history not art 😉 )

I also remember learning one set of quotes stood in a different location in the room – so when I came to recall the quote I imagined standing in the location that I’d connected to that phrase. I was even known at one stage to replace the lyrics of songs with the quotes instead.

I’ve also found that I’ve learnt quotes purely because I’ve heard or seen something over and over again – maybe because it’s stuck to the wall in a prominent place. Perhaps I’ve heard someone else say it many, many, times over.

My suggestion would be if you decide to actively memorise quotes to use a method that appeals to you and is fun and easy for you.

What other methods would you add to these suggestions? Has something popped into your mind as you read this that you want to go and play with?

About the Author

Jen WallerJen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.

She has created a free 7 day e-course about how to create your own unique coaching welcome pack that works for you and your clients. Get your copy here.


Do you need a gallery floor plan in your life?

This was originally published as a bonus article in the Coaching Confidence weekly email during September 2011. To start getting your very own copy each week enter your details under “Don’t miss a thing!” to the right of this page.

Do you need a gallery floor plan in your life?

Over the summer I visited the National Gallery in London with my sister. For one reason or another it’s a venue that I had never previously visited.

If, like me, it’s somewhere you haven’t set foot inside, let me briefly explain. The National Gallery houses the national collection of Western European painting from the 13th to the 19th centuries. It is on show 361 days a year, free of charge. I’m told you can see over 2300 on display.

Generally the art is arranged chronologically, geographically and by style throughout 70+ different rooms. Rather than using a map we thought we would logically visit each room and browse all the pieces on display.

The main building was opened in 1831 with extra wings added at later stages. Rooms are numbered and on a map appear to be relatively logically ordered. However, without the benefit of the floor plan, because of the building layout you may find yourself walking from room 25 into 28 with no sign of room 26.

We were not alone in standing slightly bemused in fantastic surroundings but in a spot where we could choose to go in at least four different directions.

Personally I enjoyed exploring and the unpredictable journey we ended up taking to visit each room. It also reminded me about this can often be the approach that we take when working on a project or goal in our own life. We may have established what we want but then not look at a plan for where to go next.

Some people will love that approach and exploring and yet others find it very frustrating. Personally, I think it’s whatever works for you and what you want, keeping the flexibility to use both approaches as you see fit!

This week I invite you to consider a project you have been working on – have you identified a plan?

If so, and it’s not working, what would happen if you allowed some time to explore?

If not, and you feel it’s not working, what would happen if you did find/create a plan to follow to the next stage?

Have a week full of exploring,

Love

Jen

About the Author

Jen WallerJen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.

She has created a free 7 day e-course about how to create your own unique coaching welcome pack that works for you and your clients. Get your copy here.


Niching Has Failed

Coach Angus MacLennan shares his thoughts and expertise in this week’s guest post as he explains his view that:

Niching Has Failed

by Angus MacLennan

After years of reading about the need to have a micro niche its time we admit that niching has failed! OK that is not the case in every instance but the times are changing and we need to adapt to the demands of a time poor but knowledge rich client base who are making slower buying decisions. Having a niche is no longer enough as clients are starting to demand a bespoke service. As service providers we need to give them what they want, when they want it and in the way they expect to receive it.

Clients are buying into the marketing hype that tells them they are all unique. Mix this with the ease with which they can research you, your products, your competitors and the detractors of your particular service and we have a situation where having a micro niche can count against you. Sure we are all a little different but lets face it – almost every conceivable problem has been faced by someone before.

Its easier to market to a micro niche but clients are demanding more and more now. They want a bespoke service – even if their problem is not actually unique. As a coach I have seen most problems, and there variants, and I can tell you that there are very few occasions now where I see something new. Its usually the same problem as the last client but with a particular twist.

While more and more clients feel that they have a unique problem, when you tell them its common they are happy to know they are not alone. However they still expect a bespoke solution. Its an interesting dilemma for service providers. Standard products are great and will always sell to some clients but more and more clients are expecting a service sculpted to their situation. They don’t want to hear about your niche. They want to know that you can fix their problem.

This shift is something my clients are seeing with their own clients. Their clients have taken on board the marketing that says we are all different. Interestingly, that marketing is designed to sell the same product to millions of “unique” people via mass media and mass production. People accept their “unique” shirt from Topshop is not actually unique but when they deal with smaller businesses they expect a bespoke service and my clients are finding that a narrowly defined niche can count against them.

Its time we looked to our transferable skills. What is it that we can do as professionals that can be applied to any situation. Those are the skills we need to market and those are the skills we need to highlight when selling our service. Have a niche to help your marketing but make sure you don’t miss the opportunity to help all those other people who could benefit from your skills but who don’t know what you can do because all they see is your niche.

Go back to basics and do a skills assessment to highlight your transferable skills and abilities. If you are crystal clear on your own broad range of skills you will start to notice more opportunities that you may have missed before. There are so many people out there who need your skills. Once I realised I needed to look up from niche marketing I saw so many more opportunities and my business has tripled in turnover in the last 8 months. Same clients but they are coming from so many new and different directions.

See a need, fill a need.

Have a great day.

Angus

About the Author/Further Resources

My name is Angus MacLennan and I am a Coach delivering practical Business Support to Business Owners and Transitions Support to people going through Change.

I enjoy writing articles about Business and Personal Growth & Development and I am lucky enough to be published in the UK, USA, Canada and Australia and to have my work incorporated into multiple training and support programmes. When I am not out enjoying the great outdoors with my kids or helping local charities I like to spend my time Coaching and delivering Workshops.

My mission is to deliver a quality service to help every client develop their business or career and enable them to have the work/life balance they want.

Over the past 7 years I have had hundreds of hours experience coaching across three continents.

I am a Master Practitioner of NLP, a Master Results Coach and have a Degree in Industrial/Organisational Psychology and a Post Grad Dip in Personnel Management.


Do you use any quotes in your coaching? 1

“Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind.” (Rudyard Kipling)

If you have been following this blog on twitter you will have noticed a regular number of quotes tweeted throughout the day. These are quotes that often prompt a response from those reading.

It’s not at all unknown for one person to contact me to share that they disagree with the words in one quote, whilst someone else will tell me that the exact same quote is positive and encouraging, maybe even offering a new useful insight.

So are you reading that and thinking that a quote like that would be one that you would or wouldn’t like to use in a coaching session?

Quotes are yet another thing that can be at the coaches disposal to use during a coaching session. As with all methods that are at our disposal as coaches when and if you decide to use a quote will vary on individual circumstance. But why would you want to use quotes?

I thought I’d share some of the things I consider when using quotes and which ones to use. Quotes are not the only way of doing many of these points; it is just another approach to have added flexibility.

I may use a quote as a starting point with a client. Perhaps a way to gently test if my suspicions about a belief or perspective that is causing an obstacle for the client. Using the quote as a way to gauge their reaction and take the next step.

I may also use a quote to “pace” the clients current position before leading them into exploring new perspectives. By “pace” I mean starting with the same perspective as the client. It is quite possible that the quotes that are most appropriate in this instance are not necessarily a perspective you personally share.

I personally believe that my work is not just about what happens during our scheduled time together but also about being a catalyst and facilitating outside of that time. If I know I’m working with a client who likes to learn by researching it is possible that I will use a quote to credit an origin of an approach etc if I suspect that they may want to explore that in more depth.

It is not the only reason I may use quotes as a coach. I may want to use a quote to gently provoke and challenge. Placing a distance between the words of the quote and the person saying it in some circumstances can make it easier for the listener to hear the message or underlying question.

Some coaches also use quotes if they feel that a more direct option may damage the coaching relationship. Perhaps they are at the start of their coaching relationship and feel that the client may feel defensive if it’s offered as a direct observation or question.

You can also use quotes to “borrow authority” to focus your clients attention or increase their willingness to answer a question or do an exercise. It can be used as a convincer to add extra-perceived credibility.

For example, coaching a customer-facing employee in a business you may choose to quote a specific customer. It’s entirely possible that your client will be far more open to a conversation around this than if a bystander voices the same opinion.

Or maybe you know that your client admires Richard Branson and the way he does business. You may choose to introduce an exercise around adding fun into a situation with “I’ve heard Richard Branson say ‘A business has to be involving, it has to be fun, and it has to exercise your creative instincts.’”

You may also use quotes that can inspire and motivate, grab attention or trigger new thoughts. It’s not at all unknown for me to share a quote for no better reason that it’s one that I think a client will like! 🙂

What about you? Do you use quotes in your coaching? If so what else would you add to this post?

About the Author

Jen WallerJen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.

She has created a free 7 day e-course about how to create your own unique coaching welcome pack that works for you and your clients. Get your copy here.