habits

Cultivating a Tapestry of Change: The Power of Habits in Coaching

 in quote  tagged coach / coaching / habits / quote
The background colour is close to that of an old parchment. There are two vertical borders set in slightly along the left and right edges. At the centre top is an ornate symetrical image of two flowers with a stem pointing up and to the nearest corner. Both the ornate flower flourish and the porder are in black - similar to a pen and ink style. In the centre is text that reads: "In the conduct of life, habits count for more than maxims, because habit is a living maxim, becomes flesh and instinct. To reform one's maxims is nothing: it is but to change the title of the book. To learn new habits is everything, for it is to reach the substance of life. Life is but a tissue of habits." (Henri-Frédéric Amiel)

Todays quote is:

“In the conduct of life, habits count for more than maxims, because habit is a living maxim, becomes flesh and instinct. To reform one’s maxims is nothing: it is but to change the title of the book. To learn new habits is everything, for it is to reach the substance of life. Life is but a tissue of habits.” (Henri-Frédéric Amiel)

As we gracefully navigate the third week of 2024, it’s an opportune moment to reflect on the dance between resolutions and the formidable force of habits. Henri-Frédéric Amiel, a profound philosopher, invites us to ponder the significance of habits in the intricate conduct of life. Let’s unravel the threads of this quote and weave a narrative of continuous growth and transformation.

The Unraveling of Resolutions and the Emergence of Habits:

New Year’s resolutions often embark on our journeys with grand intentions, but as the days slip by, so can our resolutions. How many have found themselves in this familiar terrain? The allure of change lies not in reforming maxims like changing a book title but in the intricate dance of cultivating new habits. Every day is an opportunity for that to happen, not just the first of the year.

A Continuous Journey of Learning and Growth:

As coaches, we witness the ebb and flow of motivation in our clients. The initial surge can often encounters stumbling blocks perhaps as the novelty fades. One secret is in recognizing that it’s never too late. Each day presents a new canvas to paint the strokes of improvement and change. What habits are your clients striving to learn? Do you guide them through the journey of habit formation?

From our perspectives as coaches – what habis do you have as a coach? I know there’s certain things I always do at the start of a coaching session – initially out of habit but I found that they actually help to draw my clients focus into our conversation, particularly if they’ve arrived to our call in a flustered state. So now, its something that I do as a conscious choice. What about you? Do you have any coaching habits and if so have you consciously chosen to keep those habits?

Resilience Beyond Resolution:

Resolutions may slip through our fingers, but the journey to instill new habits endures. The significance lies not in the speed of change but in the commitment to shaping a life adorned with purposeful habits. Every habit formed, no matter when, contributes to the beautiful tapestry of one’s life.

Navigating Client Challenges:

As coaches, do you observe specific points where clients stumble after their initial surge of motivation? How do you address these challenges and guide them back onto the path of habit formation? Share your insights and strategies in the comments below.

In the grand tapestry of life, habits weave the threads that form the substance of our existence. Embrace each day as an opportunity to learn, grow, and cultivate habits that resonate with the life you envision. Feel free to share your thoughts in the coment section below.

About Jen Waller

Jen Waller

Jen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.

As an experienced coach and trainer Jen is happy to utilise all skills at her disposal to assist clients from getting out of their own way and making a difference in the world with their coaching. Find out more about the support Jen offers here.

Developing Better Habits 1

 in Guest Post  tagged acceptance / Amber Fogarty / Aristotle / awareness / Bill Moyer / business coach / business coaching / change / charging / client / clients / coach / coaches / coaching / coaching courses / coaching qualifications / coaching skills / coaching techniques / coaching training / executive coach / future / habits / leadership / leadership coaching / life coach / life coaches / life coaching / Nathaniel Branden / nlp coach / past / performance coaching / personal coach / personal development / present / SOS Coaching Network / SOSleadership

In the first guest post of 2012, coach Amber Fogarty discusses something she talks about a lot with clients.

Developing Better Habits

by Amber Fogarty

In our work with clients, we talk a lot about developing better habits. In fact, when people ask me to tell them more about what SOS Leadership does, I often reply, “We’re in the habit change business.” All of us, as coaches, are in the habit change business. Habit change is inherently connected to leadership development.

The most basic definition of leadership is influence. As a leader, the way you influence others, and ultimately lead them, is your personal choice. With that choice comes great responsibility.

In the SOS Leadership Seeds of Success program, we define the responsibilities of leadership. The first responsibility is one that can bring a certain amount of pressure and anxiety when we consider it in light of our weaknesses and bad habits:

People become like their leader.

When I think about this, at times it makes me feel uneasy. Yes, there are many positive traits that I wouldn’t mind others learning from me, but there are just as many negative characteristics that I don’t want to pass on to anyone, especially those who consider me to be a leader in their lives.

But what can I do to develop better habits? How can I overcome habits that have developed over many years?

First and foremost, I have to name them. Yes, I have to say out loud what habits I need to change and why. As Nathaniel Branden once said, “The first step toward change is awareness. The second step is acceptance.” Reflecting on Nathaniel’s words, I know that this is easier said than done. For the most part, we are all aware of our shortcomings, but we don’t necessarily accept them. I agree that we have to understand and accept that we are the way we are today; however, beginning right now we can commit to becoming a better version of ourselves.

SOS Leadership co-founder Bill Moyer reminds our clients often that the past does not equal the future, but the past does equal the present. We need to understand where we’ve been in order to fully commit to changing the future.

Once we are aware of the habits we want to change and have accepted that change is desired and necessary, then we have to make a commitment to developing better habits. This includes developing a written goal, complete with an action plan, for each habit we want to develop. The plan should identify the benefits to be gained by developing this particular habit, as well as the losses to be avoided if we do not change. Beyond that, the plan needs to spell out each obstacle and how to overcome it, as well as how we will track our progress and who we will ask to hold us accountable.

Don’t underestimate the power of tracking and accountability. These are vitally important components of your plan and will help you to always be aware of your progress and challenged when you get off track.

So what habits will you commit to developing (or changing) this year? In the words of Aristotle, “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” A new year is the perfect time to make a change. Go for it! Become more excellent!

About the Author/Further Resources

Amber Fogarty is a Partner and Coach with SOS Leadership Institute and the SOS Coaching Network, which unites an elite group of coaches, trainers, and consultants from around the world, providing them with personalized programs, coaching, and tools to help them succeed in the rapidly growing coaching industry. Learn more at www.soscoachingnetwork.com.