coaching training


Acting from Fear vs Love 1

Coach Louise Gillespie-Smith shares her thoughts and experience in today’s guest post:

"Acting from Fear vs Love" A guest post by Louise Gillespie-Smith

Acting from Fear vs Love

By Louise Gillespie-Smith

Most of the time as a life coach I am really living my dream; I am inspired, I am enjoying doing the things I love and I am empowering people to live a life they love too. Then there are other times when I find myself behaving from a totally different place, from fear.

I can recognise it now, it’s like I have had a double espresso even though I don’t drink caffeine anymore. An anxious feeling starts to burn in my heart, my actions are frenzied and I am not connected to who I really am at all.

Surely a life coach doesn’t feel fear?! GASP!

Coaches are seen as such positive inspirational people that it can be hard to admit to feeling like this to others and even to myself sometimes. However we are all human and sometimes it’s natural to get a bit scared, it’s what you do with the fear that matters. What you resist does indeed persist so acknowledging the signals that you are in the fear zone is the first step to turning it in to love, which is our true nature.

At the core of our being is love, this is who we are and this is what we have to share with the world. We have chosen to walk down the path of being coaches to support and empower people to be who they truly are. So it’s important that we do the same for ourselves!

Following are a few things I have found that work for me to bring myself out of the fear zone and into acting from a place of love;

  • Go outside and connect with the earth. Fear is in our minds, when we are caught up with self-talk we are not grounded or in our bodies at all. If I notice myself tensing up, thoughts spinning round and round I’ll stop what I am doing and go outside. Even if it’s just for 10 minutes I will feel the earth beneath my feet, I’ll listen to the birds, I’ll watch the sun sparkling on the sea, where ever I am I will take a few moments to bring myself back to the present moment right here right now.
  • Remind yourself “there is only ever this moment and right now I have a choice of who I am being, which parts of my personality I wish to draw upon”.
  • Meditate, I find this one particularly works:

Sit in silence for a few minutes paying attention to the rise and fall breath

Start to think about all the things you are grateful for

Start to bring to mind your fear and then release it to God/ The Universe

Pay attention to your heart beating, feel every sensation, consciously use your intention to slow it down.

Send your intention to feel your heart beating in your hands and to feel the warmth grow in them.

Finally repeat an affirmation that works for you. For example “I am safe and totally protected by the Universe/ God, all is well”.

  • Get into your body by doing some exercise, I teach yoga and find this perfect for calming my mind down. Dance also really connects me with my body. Do something that works for you.
  • Ask what will bring me joy? Then do that. For us to be able to help others we need to be taking care of ourselves. Self-love is crucial for us to have the energy and inspiration to help others.

I’ve got to admit I find writing a blog for other coaches slightly daunting as I am sure you will already know lots of this stuff already but I also know that sometimes we just need a little reminder! Being kind and loving to yourself is what is going to help you be able to share your love and support with everyone else you come into contact with.

About the Author/Further Resources

Louise Gillespie-Smith runs a business called Create Yourself which empowers and supports people in making positive change in their life. She has a holistic toolkit of resources, life coaching/NLP/ yoga/ reiki/ image consultancy, to create individually tailored packages based on what each client needs. lo****@***************co.uk /07779 150886.

Find Louise and Create Yourself on Facebook at www.facebook.com/CREATEYOURSELF and follow Louise on Twitter at www.twitter.com/LouiseatCreate

 


How to Bolster Group Productivity (and Enjoyment!) Using Retrospectives 1

Business productivity coaches Laura Waite and Collin Lyons share a technique in today’s guest post:

"How to Bolster Group Productivity (and Enjoyment!) Using Retrospectives" A guest post by  Laura Waite and Collin Lyons

How to Bolster Group Productivity (and Enjoyment!) Using Retrospectives

by Laura Waite and Collin Lyons

If you’re working with a team, as a coach or as a member, you’ll know already that a well-oiled working group is wonderful to behold and even more enjoyable to be a part of. Fortunately, it’s easy to encourage because the exhilaration of seeing your team grow far outweighs the effort of making it happen. As a coach, there is an easy technique available to you to help your team do just that.

It’s called a Retrospective, and it’s about sharing feedback as a group. It’s a simple technique to help you find new opportunities to improve and to catapult your team to incredible levels of effectiveness, which is inspiring for everyone in the group. It only requires stepping away to pause, reflect and decide what actions to take in order to make improvements. Here’s how:

Reflect silently on the event or time period

Ask the group to take 3-5 minutes to look backwards and reflect on the event (e.g. a meeting, a workshop) or time period (e.g. the last two weeks or month) and in silence write down their answers to the following four questions:

  • What went well? In other words, what took place that we want to recognise and acknowledge as having gone well?
  • What didn’t go so well? What took place that didn’t go as we would have liked?
  • What did I learn? We want to think about what we’ve learned about how we worked together. It’s less about the content and more about the process.
  • What still puzzles me? This question allows us to capture things that happened that left us feeling unclear or puzzled.

(In case you’re interested, these questions are adapted from the daily temperature reading and other wonderful work of Virginia Satir, which continues to help so many people in different fields and walks of life to build and maintain healthy relationships.)

As you begin, remind everyone that:

  • They may not have answers for every question – and that’s okay!
  • They should only consider what happened and avoid identifying suggestions of what to do in the future… that’s for later.
  • They should be succinct in their answers so we can share them quickly and keep the energy levels up in the next step.

The silence part is the key here: it’s been shown that, when brainstorming (that is, coming up with various ideas for consideration as a group), it’s best to give individuals a chance to gather their thoughts before having an open-aired expression of ideas. Taking a moment to identify your own ideas in silence allows each individual to freely explore their own thoughts before being influenced by those of others. After all, as Nobel Prize-winning chemist Linus Pauling said, “The best way to have a good idea is to have a lot of ideas.” It’s a simple adjustment, but one that vastly improves the quality of feedback available for consideration during your Retrospective.

Share with the group and consolidate the answers

Now we want the group to share their answers with everyone. One by one, go around the room and have each person share their answers. Some people like to focus on the first question before moving on to the next question. As people share their answers, capture them in a centrally visible location, such as a whiteboard or flipchart paper on the walls around the room. There’s no need to capture duplicates.

One of the key elements of a Retrospective is giving everyone on the team the opportunity to be heard – something that can assist greatly with team morale. Don’t lose that opportunity! Make sure that you write what the person actually said, not your interpretation of it. As an illustration, recently a team member said, “Product Management missed some of our key meetings, such as the FSCM discussions, and that meant we made decisions without the correct amount of input,” but what was written up on the board was “Product Management”. Quite a bit different – and very much open for interpretation. It’s a skill to write what is actually said that, thankfully, can be improved – so go easy on yourself if it feels difficult to do initially.

Select a few valuable areas to make improvements

Now that everyone can see all the answers provided, as a group, we want to identify a few high value items to work on – but only a few. Why? Because there’s only so much change we can take on at one time – 3-5 items is usually a good amount.

Identify actions that will lead to team improvement

Up until now, everything we’ve done has been about looking backwards. We’ve looked back over the specific event or time period and reflected on what happened. Now it’s time to look forward. What do we want to do differently next time in order to improve? For each of the items selected in the last step, the group should agree an action that can be taken to make an improvement. This action should be something within the control of the team. Request volunteers for a champion – it’s worth making clear that the champion isn’t necessarily the person who will do the action. Often they are simply the person who will be the conscience of the team to make sure the action is taken.

Why is it important to consciously separate the time you spend reflecting on the past from the time you spend thinking about changes for the future? As humans, we have a natural desire to think about how to make things better. The problem is, if we jump to the solution too quickly, we often find that we’ve come up with a great solution to an entirely different problem. This can be prevented by specifically separating the activity of reflecting on the past (by answering the 4 questions) from the activity of coming up with actions for improvement.

When trying to create an environment of continuous improvement, the most important thing to do is to keep everyone enthusiastic and optimistic that the change will, first of all, work and, second of all, stick. Your chances of achieving this are greatly increased if you tackle the most valuable areas of improvement – the ones that are causing the most pain, to the most people – so that when the change happens the positive benefits can be felt by as many team members as possible. They’ll get excited and happy to press on with further changes – it’s a win-win situation that will keep your team improving, now and in the future!

Delve a Bit Deeper into Retrospectives

If you’re interested in learning more about Retrospectives and some great insights into how to really get full value from there, have a look at our tips for using continuous improvement to bolster a group’s productivity – you can find out how to get full value from your Retrospectives, how to feel the power of celebration and how to hear every member of the team’s voice.

About the author

Laura Waite and Collin Lyons are the duo of business productivity coaches behind Flowmotion. For people in the office world who want to feel the buzz, Flowmotion is an enterprise that will awaken your passion for work. To address the all-too-typical experience of unenergetic working lives, our mission is to redesign how people interact with their environment to generate engaging, productive and collaborative atmospheres and organisations. We share several decades of experience providing organisational transformation and executive coaching and have worked with large and global organisations including: British Telecom, British Petroleum, Standard Life Assurance and Investments, British Gas/Centrica, JPMorgan Chase, Wells Fargo, Allied Irish Bank and the UK Government. You can find us at www.flowmotioncafe.com

Join Us to Learn More

If you’d like to delve even more into how to get the productivity of your team to sky-rocket, we’d love to welcome you at one of our upcoming training retreats, hosted in a gorgeous, lakeside cottage, with home-cooked meals, two wood-burning fireplaces, on-site massages, and a Hot Tub for unwinding in the evening – luxury training at it’s best!

 


Does Coaching Empower the Appraisal Lifecycle in Business Process Outsourcing Firms? 1

In today’s guest post Amarpreet Bhamra shares his thoughts and knowledge about coaching and employee appraisal systems.

"Does Coaching Empower the Appraisal Lifecycle in Business Process Outsourcing Firms?"  A guest post by Amarpreet Bhamra

Does Coaching Empower the Appraisal Lifecycle in Business Process Outsourcing Firms?

by Amarpreet Bhamra

The annual appraisal process kick starts with the close of a year in the business process outsourcing firms. The appraisal is a summary (lifecycle varies from annual to quarterly to bi-annual) gage the performance of the employee against the business target as well as discuss and define future plans for corporate success. However over the past few years the ratings and subsequent hike (both from the perspective of the manager and the employee) have occupied center stage during the discussions.

How do we restore faith in the appraisal process? Do we limit ourselves only to the performance feedback? Is there a merit to proactively engage and seek clarity on the steps for a well rounded career? Hence coaching is a powerful tool and needs to be positioned in this context to provide a value enabling perspective.

To begin with both employees and managers need to transition from a mindset of providing feedback to coach on inputs which mould a corporate career. Thus coaching could aid the manager to balance the subtle underplay between meeting targets and coaching on the inputs for meeting targets.

The next step outlines the manager to coach the employee on the available skills and training options to further advance their respective careers. Also business process outsourcing firms must not dilute the perspective on either cultivating internal coaches or hire external expertise to coach the manager on the delivery mechanism. Plus the engagement should further incorporate coaching on change and stakeholder management as employees have to engage cross-functionally on allocated tasks within current and future roles.

Furthermore coaching as a process has to be embedded in the business process outsourcing firms to nurture the coaching environment. This may drive out the fear factor associated with the existing appraisal process and promote openness to feedback. Moreover the value of coaching is transparent with corresponding change in the appraisal equation from being viewed as a ‘checklist’ to a ‘process’ replete with balanced inputs.

The relevance of coaching gains visibility in the event of appraisal conversations being layered with emotions. Coaches are likely to rehabilitate the employee in the aftermath of a poor performance rating by providing encouragement. Also coaching may benefit managers when they have to conduct difficult conversations with employees without being too critical and agitated and thereby gaining the commitment of the employees to actions. Plus coaching may morph the appraisal into a platform for open and honest conversations based on trust.

The combination of feedback and coaching strengthens the delivery of the appraisal process and cultivates belief in the value of developmental feedback. The employee may stumble upon alternative perspectives or hidden issues in lieu of effective coaching techniques. Other benefits to be accrued include higher levels of employee engagement, enhanced job satisfaction, motivated workforce and low employee turnover thereby reducing operating costs.

Lastly coaching is palmed off as performance feedback based on my own professional experience in business process outsourcing firms in India. A majority of the surveys soliciting feedback on appraisals and managerial effectiveness rarely include questions on coaching. Hence to save the appraisal lifecycle from further erosion of trust we need to invest in coaching and unlock the human potential to excel further.

About the author

Amarpreet Bhamra Amarpreet Bhamra is business process management professional with fifteen years of comprehensive and diverse work experience in business process outsourcing. He has held leadership roles in Service Delivery and Quality in reputed business process outsourcing firms like GE Capital, TATA Business Support Services, GE Global Servicing and Hutchison 3 Global Services. He currently works with Maersk Global Service Center as part of Process Excellence/Finance and Accounts-Transformations in Pune.

Amarpreet is in the process of graduating in Executive Program in Leadership and Management from Indian Institute of Management-Calcutta. He is a certified LEAN Six Sigma Black Belt-Anexas, Six Sigma Green Belt-GE Capital, certified internal Assessor-TATA Management Training Center and certified Coach-Corporate Coach U. He has completed his Advanced Diploma in Financial Management-Indian School of Business Management and Administration and holds two post graduate degrees in Communications-University of Hyderabad and English-Panjab University and a graduate degree in English-Panjab University.

You can reach him at: am************@***oo.com


Charging What You’re Worth 1

In today’s guest post coach Christa Lynn Colletti looks at a topic many coaches, especially when starting out, struggle with:

"Charging What You're Worth" A guest post by coach Christa Lynn Colletti

Charging What You’re Worth

by Christa Lynn Colletti

When starting out as a coach, it can be difficult to set your session fee. Although you have the confidence that you are meant to work with people towards greater success, actually quoting the price to them can seem daunting. If you charge too little, you undermine the value you offer and the client might have trouble taking coaching as a serious method for radical life change. If you charge too much, then you run the risk of turning away potential paying clients that you could use as hours for eventual certification. Here are some strategies to help you manage the uneasiness you might have about your fees.

Always Charge Something

If you are just starting out as a coach, always charge some monetary amount for your services, whether it be $1, $5, or $500. Pro bono hours will help you with honing your skills, but only count minimally towards certification. Also, with pro-bono coaching you might have issues with clients’ commitment to their coaching sessions; free stuff is easy to blow off. Bartering is another option and I have used it in my own practice. I currently have one client working on my logo in exchange for coaching. These hours do count as paid hours by the International Coach Federation and by bartering, you open up the option of working with clients who are greatly in need of your services but can’t pay your regular fee.

Have Conviction About the Value You Provide

When you settle on a fee, make sure it represents the full value that you feel you provide to the client. Clients who resonate with you and are serious about life change will pay your fee to work with you, but you must have conviction about your value to the client. This might mean you have to pass up some clients who can’t afford the fee and have nothing to barter with. However, if you are really interested in working with a certain client, you always have the option to work on a sliding scale.

Think About How Much People Pay for Luxury Services

If you are still unsure about your fees, think about how much money people spend on luxury services every day. By luxury I mean something that people pay someone else to do or something that isn’t necessary for daily life, yet people willingly pay these amounts every day. Here in my sunny part of Florida, USA, a massage costs anywhere from $80 to $200 per hour. House cleaning? $75 to $100 for two hours. Manicure? $30 to $50. Personal trainer? $50-$100 per hour, and the list goes on. People pay these amounts without batting an eye. How much is your potential client willing to pay for the chance to work with you to create lasting and positive change in his or her life? Think about this when stating your fees to any potential clients.

Make Adjustments Based on What Your Local Economy Will Bear

Despite all of this confident talk about charging what you’re worth, it must be tempered with consideration for the condition of your local economy. If you plan to do only face-to-face coaching with local clients, think about what people pay for luxury services in your area, and tailor it to that. However, I urge you to think bigger. Again this goes back to having conviction about the value you provide. Have national or international clients via phone call and lowering your fees won’t be an issue.

The Sliding Scale Option

I mentioned the option of a sliding scale in the beginning of my post and it’s also a possibility if you need to adjust your fees to fit your local economy. However I want to add a word of caution: Limit these generous opportunities you provide to 2-3 clients. Think of it as a special coaching sponsorship you are doing for a few select people. If the word gets out that you are flexible, people will come to you thinking they can haggle you into a better deal. How often are a consultant’s fees negotiable? What about a massage therapist’s fees or a counselor’s fee? Serious change takes a serious investment.

I hope that you find these strategies useful, and if you have some of your own, I would love to hear about them!

About the author

Christa Lynn Colletti is a professional Life Coach and the owner of Vivacious Living. Her passion lies with working with women who feel that they have been living someone else’s life. She also enjoys working with those in transition or those who feel stuck in life. Create The Life You Seek!

www.BeVivacious.com

Find Christa on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/VivaciousLiving

Connect with Christa on Twitter at @VivaciousLiving

 


The two-minute confidence boost

Coach and leadership trainer Brian Lumsdon shares some of his experience, knowledge and a technique in today’s guest post.

"The two-minute confidence boost" A guest post by Brian Lumsdon

The two-minute confidence boost

By Brian Lumsdon

A few years ago I was blessed to study performance coaching with a brilliant trainer who I still model to this day and there was one aspect of his approach I enjoyed above everything else. On many occasions, after we covered a new topic thoroughly, he would smile wryly and say “Or you could just do this” and provide the group with a wonderfully skillful shortcut or fast-track to achieve the same outcome.

I’m always on the look out for similar approaches and so I was excited to discover Amy Cuddy’s insightful TED talk Your body language shapes who you are. This talk is in the top 30 most viewed Ted talks and Cuddy is listed number 1 in Time magazine’s Game Changers series.

In this talk Amy Cuddy shares some of her Harvard research where she shows how we can increase our levels of confidence significantly by simply adopting a power pose for just two minutes.

Swabs are taken before and after participants adopt their favourite power pose and analysis demonstrates an increase in levels of testosterone as a result. There is also a decrease in levels of cortisol (the stress hormone) and participants demonstrated higher levels of optimism in a subsequent games of chance.

Videos of participants were then shown to professional recruiters, who highlighted those who had adopted the two-minute power pose as more confident and credible candidates. So following this process also influences the perception other people have of us.

Over the last few weeks I have adapted my own power pose, a combination of two well known sports stars and myself from a specific event where I felt particularly confident. I have also added a phrase I find particularly resourceful that I will repeat during these day minutes.

After practising every day and becoming comfortable with recreating a state of confidence, I now use this technique whenever I feel the additional boost of confidence will be really useful.

There are still times in my work with successful leaders and managers when I’m surprised by some revealing they are not be as confident as they may first appear. And so during our work together achieving their goals I will often find myself saying “And you can also do this!”

About the Author/Further Resources

Brian Lumsdon is a leadership trainer and coach with TwentyOne Leadership and has created lasting change in diverse organisations over the last 15 years.

Brian specialises in creating high-performing coaching cultures and helping leaders connect employees to their vision and values. You can contact Brian via e-mail (br***@*****************ip.com) or connect via LinkedIn.

 


Re-energise your life and get a service 1

Coach Liz Scott shares a story she tells to clients in today’s guest post.

vacum

Re-energise your life and get a service

By Liz Scott

The other day my vacuum cleaner stopped working. It was half way through cleaning a rug and it suddenly died.

It wasn’t a surprise, as it hadn’t been working well for a long time. In fact I’d been picking bits of the carpet and stuffing them down the nozzle to help it out.

When it started making a funny noise I had thought to myself, “This vacuum cleaner needs a service”. That was when it stopped working all together.

As I looked despairingly at the broken machine and the half cleaned carpet I realised that for at least a year now I’d been promising it a service.

For months it had been limping along. The noise of the motor had sounded strained. But I had kept putting off a service; it had always been inconvenient.

We took the vacuum cleaner to a repairman. He took one look at it and asked when we’d last changed its filter. It’s three years old and we’ve never changed its filter. He looked aghast and made no promises that it was mendable.

He did get it working again and when we sheepishly picked it up he said he was surprised that we hadn’t burnt out the motor, the filter was so dirty. Apparently these filters need to be changed twice a year. Woops!

It was great having the vacuum cleaner back, we’d been without it for nearly a week and the house was crying out to be cleaned.

Switching it on it leapt into life with a purr of the motor. It was like we had a brand new machine. It was practically sucking up the rugs it was so powerful now. I couldn’t believe the difference.

I tell this story to some of my coaching clients. Everyone I work with is busy. These are people who have lives that are stuffed full of ‘doing things’ and they feel stretched to the limit.

They often have a glazed look of exhaustion in their eyes. They know they are working flat out, they know they are not very efficient in what they’re doing because they’re so tired; however they keep fighting on.

What we don’t realise when we get into that cycle of busy-ness is that we are quite literally wearing ourselves out. Like the vacuum cleaner, we begin a slow decline. Tasks, which we once breezed through, become arduous; decisions that seemed easy are now unclear.

We are still able to function and do our job, however the passion is gone and our hearts sink with the effort.

Like the vacuum cleaner, we need a regular service. This year make sure you take time for yourself – give yourself a ‘service’. In other words do things that re-connect you with life.

About the Author/Further Resources

Liz Scott is a leadership coach and trainer. She is currently working in schools helping to develop coaching cultures; coaching helps bring back fun and passion into teaching and learning. www.smartcoachingforschools.com

Find Liz on Twitter at @smartcoachliz


Have a Great Year – Get The Basics Right and Succeed in 2013 1

In our first guest post of 2013, business coach Angus MacLennan shares some thoughts he reminds his clients about at this time of year.

Fotolia 47797440 XS with drop shadow

Have a Great Year – Get The Basics Right and Succeed in 2013

by Angus MacLennan

It’s a new year and it’s that time of year when people set their resolutions and think about their goals. As a Business Coach it’s the time of year I remind my clients to go back to the basics. If you don’t cover the basics in your business and personal life then you may find you tend to drift.

Do these basics activities and you will have more control over your business and personal life and have a successful 2013.

1. Set SMART Goals

Goals are critical to success. Make sure you set your goals so you know what you are aiming for and when you will have to achieve it. Having clear goals allows you to put in place the actions needed to achieve your objectives. I recommend SMART goals:

Specific – get very clear about what you want and how it will feel, look, sound, smell etc.

Measurable – make sure the goals can be measured in a meaningful way. You have to measure it to know its achieved.

Achievable – make your goals challenging and achievable. They should push you but should be manageable.

Realistic – goals should always be realistic. Give yourself a something that will challenge you but that you can actually achieve.

Timed – know exactly when you will have to achieve your goal so you have a clear point to aim for.

Goals need to be clear, you must know when they are achieved, they must be a push but achievable and realistic and you must know when you will complete them.

2. Plan you diary for the year

Put all your fixed appointments, meetings you know about, main events and important dates into your diary for the whole year. All those carved in stone and can’t be moved events should go into you diary – for the whole year. This gives you a structure to start with.

3. Create a Weekly Plan

Create a weekly plan so you know what you are doing each week. Use a paper diary or a software diary but make sure you do create a plan that covers when you will be doing what over your week. Once you get the hang of that create a plan that covers 2 weeks or the whole month. This helps you plan ahead and gives you control of your actions and plans.

4. Use a To Do List

Start a To Do List that includes all the things you need to do for the week (personal and business) and put them in a priority order with Complete by Dates. If you tend to have a lot to do each day then break it down into daily To Do lists. Always focus on achieving the top 2 or 3 activities each day and you will make progress.

If you want to have a great year then make sure you cover all the basics in your business and your personal life. Ensure you have the direction and control that will set you on the path to an amazing year.

Have a happy and prosperous 2013!

Take care

Angus

About the author

Angus MacLennanMy name is Angus MacLennan and I am a Coach delivering practical Business Support to Business Owners – specialising in small to medium size businesses.

My mission is to deliver a quality service to help every client develop their business and enable them to have the work/life balance they want.

Over the past 5 years I have had thousands of hours experience coaching and delivering workshops and have had my work incorporated in training programmes across four continents.

I am a Master Practitioner of NLP, a Master Results Coach, a Master Performance Consultant and have a Degree in Industrial Psychology and a Post Grad Dip in Personnel Management.

Blog: http://coachingentrepreneurs.wordpress.com/

Linkedin: http://www.linkedin.com/in/angusmaclennan

Twitter: https://twitter.com/AngusMacLennan


Should You Coach Clients Who Are Seriously Stressed? 1

Coach Doctor Jane P Lewis shares some thoughts and experience in today’s guest post about stress.

Stress is murder!

Should You Coach Clients Who Are Seriously Stressed?

by Doctor Jane P Lewis

A couple of weeks ago I ran a session on ‘Coaching The Stressed’ at the EMCC conference in Bilbao. It was gratifyingly well-attended due to a cancellation elsewhere, and it was so interesting to hear from the many different nationalities in the room

The Big Questions

The big questions that came up were: ‘when do you refer out?’ and, ‘can you really coach someone who has reached the burn out phase?’ (See the Stress Curve diagram below).

The stress curve diagram

Opinions varied, and the divisions were almost based on national lines. There was a strong feeling among the Spanish and Portuguese delegates that you should not coach anyone whose performance is suffering due to obvious stress – even it they aren’t actually in the ‘burn out stage’. You should refer them for medical help.

The Brits, or at least people based in Britain, drew attention to the fact that you can sometimes wait a long time for counselling or similar help from the NHS. In the short term, a coach may be the only support a stressed individual has access to.

The Psychological Contract Is Broken

There was general agreement across the group that this is a growing issue across Europe. The economic situation in countries such as Greece and Portugal, not to mention UK, is bringing dramatically increased levels of stress as organisations cut staff and incomes no longer keep pace with inflation. As Prof. Cary Cooper would say, ‘the psychological contract is broken’.

Knowing When To Stop

For those of us who have been trained to probe and challenge with our coaching, one of the issues is knowing when to stop. I’ve been coaching now for 15 years, and went through my own stress nightmare before that, so I have some awareness. In the last year or two I have occasionally been stunned by the behaviour of coaches who don’t seem to know when to let up.

Coaches who, even when you tell them you can’t take any more, ask you why you are making excuses, or tell you to immerse yourself in the feeling.

Of course, part of the problem lies in the fact that the client may not know they are suffering from stress, or may not feel able to admit it. It might seem unlikely, but dis-stress is still, in some organisations, not tolerated. I have had clients who believe they must maintain a stiff upper lip or that they ‘can’t complain’ or who are so trapped in the headlights of despair that they don’t know where to turn.

The Answer?

The Bilbao group agreed that it was critical for the coach to know the boundaries of their own competence, and to understand that excessive stress can become a mental health issue. Many in the group felt the coach potentially had a role as a silent, listening, supportive, presence. That may have been influenced by the fact that the talk immediately prior to this was give by Nancy Kline, of ‘Time To Think’ fame!

We also touched on the question of whether the coach has a responsibility to contact HR if they feel that a client is potentially vulnerable. But as the HR man in the room pointed out, HR staff may not know what to do either.

Supervision can always help in such situations, but I do wonder if coach training takes sufficient account of this. On the trainings I have been on, the question of mental health issues has not been dealt with satisfactorily. It’s all very well to tell a coach to know the boundaries of their competence, but what happens when the coach doesn’t have the skills to recognise that coaching is not the appropriate intervention?

I’d love to hear your views. Should you coach someone who is clearly at the point of burn out? Is it an appropriate intervention? And at what point DO you stop?

About the author

Dr Jane P LewisDr Jane Lewis has been coaching since 1998, following outplacement coaching which helped her determine what she really wanted to do when she grew up. She specialises in helping women sort out their careers – whether they are returning from a career break, feeling lost, or simply want a new job. She also works as an HR consultant and trainer.

http://thecareersuccessdoctor.com

http://facebook.com/thecareersuccessdoctor

https://twitter.com/CareerJane

http://www.linkedin.com/in/janeplewis

Stress is Murder image © Chrisharvey | Stock Free Images & Dreamstime Stock Photos