Not all adapting is unwise. But not all of it is necessary either.
“The chameleon changes colour to match the earth.
The earth doesn’t change colours to match the chameleon.”
(African proverb)
It can be easy to forget we don’t have to twist ourselves into a version that fits everything and everyone else.
There’s something powerful in being like the earth in this proverb: steady, grounded, quietly unchanged by others’ expectations.
And something tender in noticing all the ways we’ve adapted over time, maybe without realising.
Not all adapting is unwise. But it’s worth asking:
Are we changing to fit in?
Or are we returning to what’s true?
Questions For Coaches
- Where do I still feel pressure to adapt or blend in?
- What would it mean to remain steady, even if others shift around me?
- What truths have I always known, deep down?
- When do I feel most like myself?
And just like the earth, you don’t need to change colour to be worthy of your place here.
Let the questions settle like soil – you might be surprised by what grows.
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller helps people notice the places they’ve been camouflaging without realising, and gently guides them back to their own grounded clarity.
Her coaching makes space to remember what’s always been true, even if it’s been hidden beneath layers of adaptation.