“As I became more mature I realized that failure is part of success.” (Robert G. Allen)
Some Questions For Coaches prompted by this quote:
If it really was OK to fail, and nobody would make any judgement, what action would you be taking?
How do you, and your clients, generally view failure?
Are there areas/ topics where you find you are happy to fail on the way to success and others where unless you know it’s got a high chance of succeeding, you don’t move forward?
Bonus Questions:
What advice would you give to a younger you?
What does success mean to you?
What coaching related question, topic, exercise does this prompt for you?
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.
As an experienced coach and trainer, Jen is happy to utilise all skills at her disposal to assist clients from getting out of their own way and making a difference in the world with their coaching. Find out more about the support Jen offers here.
“A hero is the one who does what he can. The others don’t.” (Romain Rolland)
Some Questions For Coaches:
In what areas of your life do you feel called to step into the role of a hero?
How does this quote resonate with your personal aspirations and vision for your life?
In what ways can we explore the concept of “doing what one can” within the context of coaching, encouraging clients to tap into their strengths and resources?
Bonus Questions:
What did this quote prompt for you?
How do you think of a hero?, Can anyone become a hero, or are there specific qualities required?
What distinguishes heroes from ordinary individuals?
How do you think that heroes overcome fear and doubt?
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.
As an experienced coach and trainer, Jen is happy to utilise all skills at her disposal to assist clients from getting out of their own way and making a difference in the world with their coaching. Find out more about the support Jen offers here.
“First thoughts are not always the best.” (Vittorio Alfieri)
The key phrase in this quote for me is ‘always.’ That qualification is a valid point. Sometimes our first thoughts are merely a product of our current state of mind, influenced by transient factors that may not accurately reflect our deeper wisdom or truth. It’s not that they don’t serve a purpose – they can be great for ‘getting the ball rolling’ and seeing what else emerges.
When working with clients, it’s common to encounter situations where their initial thoughts lead them astray. Perhaps they react impulsively out of fear or uncertainty, making decisions that they later regret. Or maybe they hold onto limiting beliefs that cloud their judgment and hinder their progress. In these moments, Alfieri’s quote serves as a gentle reminder to pause, to step back from our initial reactions, and to explore alternative perspectives.
We can guide clients to tap into their innate capacity for insight and understanding. By quieting the noise of their busy minds and tuning into their deeper intuition, clients can access a reservoir of wisdom that transcends their initial reactions. It’s what’s pointed at by phrases such as ‘your gut reaction’ and ‘intuition.’
How do you tell the difference? For me, there’s a distinct feeling around that inner wisdom. If I take a moment to ask variations of ‘is that what I really want?,’ ‘is that true?,’ or ‘do I actually think that?,’ then many first thoughts are obvious ‘no’s,’ the product of a busy mind. Whereas, my own wisdom has a much more centred, calm knowing feel. There may not be a logical, well-thought-out, many-page reasoning behind it, but I just know.
Moreover, Alfieri’s quote reminds us of the dynamic nature of thought. Our thoughts are not static; they are fluid and ever-changing, influenced by a myriad of internal and external factors. What may seem like a clear and rational thought in one moment may evolve or dissolve upon closer examination. By embracing the fluidity of thought, clients can cultivate a mindset of openness and adaptability, allowing them to navigate life’s challenges with greater ease and resilience.
As coaches, we play a crucial role in supporting clients on their journey of self-discovery and growth. Rather than imposing our own judgments or assumptions onto clients, we hold space for them to explore their thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment or criticism. We encourage them to trust in their innate capacity for insight and understanding, guiding them towards greater clarity and self-awareness.
In conclusion, Vittorio Alfieri’s quote serves as a powerful reminder for coaches and clients alike to approach their first thoughts with a sense of curiosity and discernment. By recognizing the transient nature of thought and tapping into our innate wisdom, we can navigate life’s challenges with greater clarity, resilience, and insight. Sometimes there’s wisdom in second thoughts, guiding our clients towards a deeper understanding of themselves and the world around them.
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.
As an experienced coach and trainer, Jen is happy to utilise all skills at her disposal to assist clients from getting out of their own way and making a difference in the world with their coaching. Find out more about the support Jen offers here.
“The grateful heart will always find opportunities to show its gratitude.” (Aesop)
Questions For Coaches:
Considering the emphasis on gratitude as a catalyst for action, how can we support clients in translating their feelings of appreciation into meaningful acts of kindness and generosity?
How does this quote resonate with your current understanding of gratitude and its role in shaping your life and experiences?
How can gratitude practices enhance coaching for growth?
Bonus questions:
If you were grateful for your coaching business, what opportunities occur to you?
How do you know to be grateful for something?
If you allowed your self for a few moments to wonder about gratitude, what occurs to you?
What does this quote prompt for you?
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.
As an experienced coach and trainer, Jen is happy to utilise all skills at her disposal to assist clients from getting out of their own way and making a difference in the world with their coaching. Find out more about the support Jen offers here.
“I hate to complain. No one is without their difficulties, whether in High, or low Life, & every person knows best where their own shoe pinches.” (Abigail Adams)
Some Questions For Coaches prompted by this quote:
Reflecting on “every person knows best where their own shoe pinches,” how might we explore the role of personal insight/ intuition in overcoming adversity/ finding solutions?
How does this quote resonate with your coaching journey?
How can coaches use this quote to guide clients effectively?
Bonus Questions:
If “every person knows best where their own shoe pinches” was really true, how would you describe your coaching?
Does “No one is without their difficulties, whether in High, or low Life” actually seem true to you?
What coaching related story, question or technique, did this quote prompt for you?
What else struck you about this quote?
Feel free to add a comment or your own question in the comments below.
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.
As an experienced coach and trainer, Jen is happy to utilise all skills at her disposal to assist clients from getting out of their own way and making a difference in the world with their coaching. Find out more about the support Jen offers here.
“Life is the wave’s deep whisper on the shore of a great sea beyond.” (Henry Abbey)
I think this quote beautifully captures the essence of life’s profound wisdom and interconnectedness. As a coach, I’ve found myself drawn to metaphors when talking about those invisible aspects, such as our own wisdom. Like the sea, with its vastness mirroring the depth of human experience, it helps to describe those things which we all refer to but can’t nip down to a local shop to buy, or physically put into a container. This quote, in particular, invites us to explore the whispers of life’s wisdom and their implications for our coaching journey.
So what is this quote pointing towards? For me, one aspect that jumped out at me was, what if life is not happening to us; it is happening through us? Just as the wave whispers its secrets to the shore, so too does life whisper its wisdom to us in every moment. When we listen deeply to this whisper, we open ourselves up to profound insights and understanding that can transform our coaching practice and our own lives.
The metaphor of the wave’s whisper speaks to the interconnectedness of all things—the ebb and flow of life, the rhythm of our thoughts and emotions, and the vastness of the human spirit. Just as the wave rises and falls in a dance with the sea, our thoughts and feelings also ebb and flow in a dynamic interplay of energy and our awareness.
Now, let’s consider how this quote’s imagery of life as a whisper on the shore of a great sea beyond can deepen our understanding of coaching. Just as the sea’s vastness mirrors the depth of human experience, coaching can also delve into the intricacies of our inner wisdom and interconnectedness. This quote serves as a poignant reminder of the profound insights awaiting us in our coaching journey
In my coaching, embracing the ebb and flow means recognizing the transient nature of our thoughts and emotions. Just as the wave eventually returns to the sea, our thoughts can also naturally dissipate and dissolve when we don’t hold onto them. By understanding the fluidity of thought, it helps us, and our clients, navigate life’s challenges with greater ease and resilience.
Moreover, the metaphor of the wave invites us to explore the deeper currents of consciousness—the vast sea beyond the surface of our thoughts. Beneath the surface noise of our minds lies a profound stillness and presence that is always available to us. By guiding and pointing my clients to tap into this deeper wisdom, my coaching can help them find clarity, peace, and purpose in the midst of life’s storms.
As coaches, we have the privilege of accompanying our clients on their journey of self-discovery and transformation. Just as the shore provides a stable anchor for the wave, so too can we offer a safe space for our clients to explore their innermost thoughts and feelings without judgment or fear.
The quote by Henry Abbey reminds us that life is not a destination; it is a journey—a journey of exploration, discovery, and growth. What does this quote point you towards? Does it resonate with your experience and approach to your coaching?
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.
As an experienced coach and trainer, Jen is happy to utilise all skills at her disposal to assist clients from getting out of their own way and making a difference in the world with their coaching. Find out more about the support Jen offers here.
“A sheep can not bleat in two different places at the same time.” (proverb)
It’s often said that in today’s modern world, finding focus amidst the cacophony of demands and distractions can feel like an elusive goal. This proverb speaks directly to the challenge of maintaining singular focus—a challenge that many coaches and their clients can grapple with on a daily basis.
If our thoughts and perceptions shape our reality, influencing how we perceive and respond to the world around us, how does that relate to this proverb? When we find ourselves overwhelmed by distractions or pulled in multiple directions, it may seem natural to attribute it to external factors. However, could it be a sign that our thinking has become fragmented, leading to a loss of focus and effectiveness?
Many of us have experienced moments of intense focus, where our attention is wholly absorbed in a single task. You’ve probably can think of an example when you were really focused upon a task at hand and oblivious to what else was going on around you. Maybe you got engrossed in a film or TV show, got lost in the story of a good book, or were just concentrating so hard on a project that time seem to fly by?
If you haven’t already seen the video below used in Daniel Simons and Christopher Chabris 1999 research into selective attention – you’re welcome to watch and follow the instructions on the screen.
The metaphor of the sheep unable to bleat in two different places simultaneously serves as a powerful reminder of the importance of single-pointed focus. Just as a sheep cannot divide its attention between multiple locations, neither can we divide our focus and energy without sacrificing clarity and effectiveness. By understanding the role of thought in shaping our experience, coaches can learn to cultivate a sense of presence and concentration that allows them to show up fully for their clients.
In coaching, maintaining focus is not just about managing external distractions—it’s also about cultivating a deep sense of presence and connection with our clients. When we show up fully for our clients, listening deeply and responding with empathy and understanding, we create a space for transformation and growth to occur.
One of the things that I have found with a greater understanding that our experience is created through the power of thought, is that I no longer spend anywhere near as much time feeling a need to wrestle with my thoughts or try to control them. Instead, I can simply observe my thoughts as they arise, recognising them far quicker for what they are—transient mental events that do not define who we are. Does it mean I never get caught up in a compelling thought (or whole chunks of thinking as a compelling story)? No, it’s just I tend to not take much of the thinking I used to far less seriously than before.
As coaches, we can help our clients recognise the impact of their own thinking on their experience of life. By guiding them to explore the nature of thought and its role in shaping their reality, we empower them to find greater clarity, resilience, and focus in their lives.
So what do you do as a coach if you feel before that your focus is split? I remember when I first started out in coaching, I used to think that there would be a set answer to this question – and this and variations of this question I considered a lot! Many years later, I’m going to start this by saying what I have principle learned from my own experience and talking to other coaches is that it will depend. There is no right or wrong answers here – just ones that will make an impact for you in that moment!
Perhaps there are things that you know that when you do them you seem to have a better day – perhaps it’s a morning cup of coffee or taking the dog for a walk. Maybe it’s allowing yourself time to take a moment just to focus on your breath, or you have a particular book you flick through and whatever page you land on seems to have a significant message for you. Sometimes you may just remember to ask yourself a question such as what would let you become even more focused right now? or to just do whatever occurs to you to quieten and drop your thinking.
In conclusion, the proverb “A sheep cannot bleat in two different places at the same time” underscores the importance of single-pointed focus and presence in coaching. By creating a space for deep listening, understanding, and transformation to occur, our clients can benefit from our full presence. Let us, as coaches, embody the power of presence, knowing that it is through our focused attention that true connection and growth can unfold in our coaching relationships
About Jen Waller
Jen Waller is on a mission to support, nurture and encourage coaching skills and talents from non-coach to coach and beyond.
As an experienced coach and trainer, Jen is happy to utilise all skills at her disposal to assist clients from getting out of their own way and making a difference in the world with their coaching. Find out more about the support Jen offers here.
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