After the amazing landing of US Airways Flight 1549 by Captain Chesley B Sullenberger I have heard many many people describe his actions as courageous. I think there can be little doubt that the skill and quick thinking of both him and his crew took ensured that everyone on-board reached safety having avoided so many populated obstacles en route. In my opinion their achievements are well deserving of the praise and acknowledgement that they are receiving.

I wrote a while back about the labels that people use to describe themselves and others. With all the talk of courage I reached for my dictionary and looked up a definition for the word – “the ability to control fear when facing danger or pain.” I suspect that with all the experience and training that the pilot has gave not only the ability but also an accurate picture of what was the danger.

One of my friends was talking to me recently about a new communication skill they are learning when they told me that they would do a bit more reading and maybe then they would have the courage to practice. The comment fascinated me as I wondered what on earth they were imagining could happen to need courage.

You may have come across the acronym of FEAR being False Evidence Appearing Real and sometimes that fear is caused by not having taken a real look at what could happen. (Note I’m not saying that this doesn’t feel real to the individual involved, what I am saying is that sometimes the thought that triggered that flight or fight adrenaline rush is not based on truth.) Using the definition of courage as being “the ability to control fear when facing danger or pain.” one way of being courageous is to actually check if there is any actual real danger or pain.

I invite you to play with the following. You may want to play with something that you think you’ll need courage to take any action. You may find it useful to have some way of recording your answers. (I will add that if there is a real physical danger involved then do please make sure that you do whatever it takes to make sure that you are safe.)

1. In this situation, what is the very worst thing that could happen? Just like in the dark when a shadow of a normal everyday object can look far scarier then it is in reality when you switch the light on, its not unusual for someone to switch the light on to look at what the worst thing that can happen and realise that actually isn’t scary at all.
(Note, be gentle with yourself here as this can be a really powerful exercise)

2. At the other end of the scale what’s the very best thing that could happen? We’re only looking at possibilities here so it is only fair to make sure that you look at ALL the possibilities.

3. Having looked at the two extremes what would fall in the middle for you, realistically?

4. If you weren’t afraid what would you do?

5. Having answered these 4 questions, notice how different you feel about this situation now.

6. If you feel that you want to take some action then go do it – remember you are the one with the choice, even if the choice is to do nothing 🙂

Have a fantastic week

Love

Jen

This was first posted on www.YourChangingDirection.com