May 17 2013

Using The Pygmalion Effect in Coaching

Category: Guest Post — This is a post by a Guest Author @ 6:30 am

In this week’s guest post Beth Burgess shares a study from the 1960′s and how it links to coaching.

"Using The Pygmalion Effect in Coaching" A guest post by Beth Burgess

Using The Pygmalion Effect in Coaching

By Beth Burgess

As coaches, we often work on the limiting beliefs of our clients; but we should be just as concerned about how much we believe in our clients and their potential, and how we demonstrate that.

We know that what people believe about themselves has a massive impact on what they are capable of. But often clients come to us because they don’t necessarily believe in themselves. Our clients have frequently been struggling to reach a goal or take action because of their limiting beliefs.

How vitally important it is, then, that we impart to our clients the belief they may lack. If we hold limiting beliefs about our clients, we will not be able to help them get to where they want to go.

Belief in the realisation of our goals motivates us to keep pursuing them and overcoming the obstacles. The same goes for how we motivate our clients. You can not push someone to achieve if you don’t really believe they have a chance.

In fact, the belief of the coach in the potential of the client is a fundamental factor in their success, much more so than what their current abilities may be.

A 1964 study by Robert Rosenthal gave us the term The Pygmalion Effect, a phenomenon in which people perform better if others believe in them and expect them to excel.

In an experiment, school children were given an IQ test, with Rosenthal telling the teachers it was a special test from Harvard University that would predict which students would be ‘academic bloomers’. Rosenthal picked out a few random children and told teachers that these students were more gifted than the others, ostensibly based on the test results.

Over the next two years, the children who had been identified as gifted had gained more IQ points in comparison to the kids who had not been picked out as ‘special’. The only defining factor in which of the kids achieved was the teachers’ belief in these being academically gifted students.

Rosenthal found that teachers who believed in their students tended to be warmer, more nurturing, gave more detailed feedback and ‘pushed’ their learners more.

All good coaches know the importance of building a nurturing relationship, good feedback, encouragement and accountability. As long as a strong and genuine belief in the client underpins that, then you are setting your client up for success.

And remember to make it known to your clients that you believe in them, too. Anyone who has ever heard the heartfelt words “I believe in you” can tell you the massive boost in confidence and self esteem that it gives them. Just knowing that another person believes you can succeed can be a very powerful experience.

“If we treat people as they are, we make them worse. If we treat people as they ought to be, we help them become what they are capable of becoming.” – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

About the Author

Beth Burgess is the founder of Smyls a solution-focused service which she set up to help people to overcome obstacles in their lives and create a fulfilling future.

Using a mixture of Coaching, NLP, Hypnotherapy and Dialectical Behaviour Therapy, Beth specialises in working with addiction, anxiety disorders, eating disorders and other mental health problems. In addition to her work with individuals, she also runs anti-stress workshops.

Beth is the author of two books on addiction recovery; The Recovery Formula: An Addict’s Guide to Getting Clean & Sober Forever (2012) and The Happy Addict (due to be published in July 2013).

She has also published a mini e-book, What is Self Esteem? How to Build your Self-Esteem and Feel Happy Now.

Beth lives in North London and coaches clients from all over the world. Her other projects include writing articles for The Huffington Post and promoting the message of recovery wherever she can.

For more about Beth, visit http://www.bethburgess.co.uk

 

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May 10 2013

Coaching with Logical Levels

Category: Guest Post — This is a post by a Guest Author @ 6:30 am

In this week’s guest post Phil Manington shares how he uses a specific NLP model.

"Coaching with Logical Levels" A guest post by Phil Manington

Coaching with Logical Levels

By Phil Manington

Anyone familiar with NLP will probably have come across Robert Dilts’s Logical Levels model. It is a great tool for exploring how and why we do what we do. It works at a system level and provides a powerful way of creating sustainable change in an individual or organisation.

It looks at our thinking across six levels:

  • The Environment level involves the external conditions in which you live. Questions such as: “Where?”, “When?” and “With whom?” are typical Environment level questions.
  • The Behaviour level refers to what you do in different environments.
  • Capabilities (whether mental, physical or emotional) describe how you do what you do. What are your skills and strategies for taking action?
  • Beliefs and Values define why you do something and shape the way you perceive the world. Beliefs can be both empowering and limiting.
  • Identity consolidates whole systems of beliefs and values into a sense of self. It defines who you think you are, as an individual or an organisation.
  • Purpose involves your connection to something that goes beyond yourself. At this level, useful questions are: “For whom am I doing this?” and “What is my purpose?”.

Many change initiatives focus at the behaviour and capability levels and this can be very effective on occasions. For example, anyone wanting to lose weight will have used exercise and/or dieting to become more fit and healthy.

However, when a client comes for coaching it is usually because they have tried these approaches and they haven’t worked – they are stuck. The Logical Levels model provides a way uncovering the root cause of the situation.

Uncovering the Root Cause

Listening to the client’s language will provide useful pointers to the level that might be important. For example:

  • I usually end up in the kitchen at parties (environment/behaviour)
  • I argue a lot (behaviour)
  • I’m not very good at dancing (capability)
  • People should tell the truth (belief)
  • I want to be less stressed (value)
  • That’s just the sort of person I am (identity)

You may notice your client is focussing around certain levels – you can gather more information by asking questions that take them to other levels. For example:

  • What do you feel when that happens? (behaviour)
  • Why is that important to you? (value)
  • What assumptions are you making about this? (belief)
  • What does that say about you as a person? (identity)
  • What does that do for you? (value)

.

Making Changes

Clearly the way you help a client change depends on the specific information you uncover but guiding them round the levels can break through seemingly insoluble blocks. Here’s an example:

After my marriage broke up, I suffered a crisis of confidence and was thrown back into an old set of beliefs about not being attractive to women. My friends encouraged me to “just get out there” and I knew, rationally that this made sense. After all, one of my favourite books is ‘Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway’! And yet I kept putting it off. My coach and colleague, Steve, helped me shift from this stuck place:

We started with my assertion that “I am not attractive to women” – an identity level statement. Rather than trying to challenge this directly he moved me around the levels. He said:

“OK, let’s put that to one side for a moment – tell me what your strengths are”.

I listed a number of things and he picked up on something that I said about learning. Not only am I good at learning but I am passionate about it – I love it. So we had established a capability and a core value for me.

His next question was a great example of elegant coaching:

“So, returning to your relationship with women, who do you know who’s good at it?”

This is a loaded question, with a presupposition that relating to women is a skill issue, not an identity one. Of course, I could name several people and we discussed what they did that seemed to work. His next question:

“So, do you think you could learn to do some of those things?”

was met with cautious optimism and I finished our session with the belief that being attractive was more about skill and behaviour rather than identity – and I also had practical actions to start improving.

This sort of approach works really well for anyone who has low self-confidence or low self-esteem. It’s particularly dispiriting to hold a limiting belief at the identity level because we don’t feel we can possibly change. But often it is only a belief and by using the Logical Levels model to change the way someone sees themselves (for example, from “that’s just who I am” to “I am just not very skilled yet”), it is possible to facilitate quite profound transformations.

About the Author

Phil Manington is co-founder of Suffolk Coaching Zone. He is a professional trainer, coach and management consultant, specialising in helping businesses and individuals to make successful change and achieve their full potential.

Phil currently offers training, workshops and one-to-one coaching for personal and business clients. Specialist areas include leadership skills, building self-confidence and self-esteem, and improving relationships.

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/SuffolkCoachingZone

Twitter – @SuffolkCZ

Website – http://www.suffolk-coaching.com

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May 03 2013

Achieve your career goals: Let’s lean in together

Category: Guest Post — This is a post by a Guest Author @ 6:30 am

In this week’s guest post Gina Visram discusses a book that inspires her and shares her own thoughts and experiences.

"Achieve your career goals: Let’s lean in together" A guest post By Gina Visram

Achieve your career goals: Let’s lean in together

By Gina Visram

As coaches, we tend to be avid readers. From industry ‘classics’ like Stephen Covey’s The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People to more recent personal development / business books on the scene like Karen Williams’ The Secrets of Successful Coaches, Daniel Priestley’s Key Person of Influence and Bev James’ Do it or Ditch It – as coaches, we favour books that will not only inspire our clients but that will also inspire us to be our best, to provide the best service to our clients and to achieve our own goals.

It is with this in mind that I highly, highly (yes… I did deliberately type that twice) recommend Sheryl Sandberg’s book, Lean In. Sheryl is the COO of Facebook and is not only formidable in business terms but also an excellent motivator due to her experience and passion when it comes to women’s leadership. In her book, she examines why women’s progress in achieving leadership roles has stalled, explains the root causes and offers solutions that can empower women to reach their full potential.

Her main message to women is to “sit at the table” i.e. lean in – seek challenges, take risks and pursue goals wholeheartedly. She moves the discussion from what women can’t do to what they can… a necessary, positive reframe that we, as coaches, fully embrace.

With a combination of solid research and anecdotal evidence, there is no shortage of memorable nuggets throughout this text, and below are just a few of them:

  • “I truly believe that the single, most important career decision that a woman makes is whether she will have a life partner and who that life partner is. I don’t know of one woman in a leadership position whose life partner is not fully – and I mean fully – supportive of her career.”
  • “For many men, the fundamental assumption is that they can have both a successful professional life and a fulfilling personal life. For many women, the assumption is that trying to do both is difficult at best and impossible at worst. Women are hounded by headlines and stories warning them that they cannot be committed to both their families and careers. They are told over and over again that they have to choose because if they try to do too much they’ll be unhappy.”
  • “Feeling confident – or pretending that you feel confident – is necessary to reach for opportunities. It’s a cliché but opportunities are rarely offered; they are seized.”
  • “Less than six months after I started at Facebook, Mark [Zuckerberg] and I sat down for my first formal review. One of the things he told me was that my desire to be liked by everyone would hold me back. He said that when you want to change things, you can’t please everyone. If you do please everyone, you are not making enough progress. Mark was right.”

This book has received a lot of buzz since its release in March 2013 and true to Sheryl’s comment above about not being able to please everyone – she has received a hefty dollop of criticism since publication. More importantly however, she has also successfully connected with a number of women (and men) who like me, think that absorbing and acting on some of the thinking presented in this book could have a positive, and potentially even revolutionary outcome on the workplace as we know it.

Sheryl Sandberg’s book, Lean In and Gina Visram's book Happily Ever AfterIn fact, I am proud to say that I recently ‘leaned in’ by completing my first book, a career coaching book entitled “Happily Ever After for Grown-Ups: A non-fairytale, post-wedding, blues-busting guide for newlyweds.” While coming from a different angle, my book is also about achieving a successful personal/professional balance and I must admit, it feels good to be leaning in further towards my coaching aspirations through achieving this milestone.

What should you take away from this post?

  1. As a coach, male or female – I highly recommend that you read Lean In. Agree or disagree – it is certainly thought provoking and in my humble opinion, a fantastic read and motivational platform for clients and coaches alike.
  2. If you would like to support a fellow coach and/or if you coach around the area of careers, relationships and/or ‘work/life balance’ – please do check out and purchase Happily Ever After for Grown-Ups – available on Amazon from 15 April 2013. (If you can’t promote your own work… who will?!)

About Gina Visram

Gina is a career coach, speaker, mentor and author who works with ambitious, multi-tasking women (and men!) who are ready to work hard at being successful in their careers and personal lives – on their own terms. As part of her ‘Limitless Coaching’ initiative, she works with clients to help them maximise or regain focus and drive to achieve key goals. A relative newlywed herself, Gina married on 29 April 2011 (same day as the ‘royal wedding’) and is emerging rapidly as a lead moderator and facilitator in discourse on the traditionally “hushed” subject of ‘post-wedding blues’.

To enquire about working with Gina, stay in touch and find out more about local and online workshops in relation to the book Happily Ever After for Grown-Ups, follow her on Twitter @bridemotivation, connect through Facebook page “Happily Ever After for Grown-Ups” www.facebook.com/happilyeverafterforgrownups and visit her Limitless Coaching website www.limitlesscoaching.com

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Apr 26 2013

How to measure if your business building efforts are working

Category: Guest Post — This is a post by a Guest Author @ 6:30 am

In today’s guest post Michele Christensen shares some of her experience and knowledge to focus upon the subject of building a coaching business.

"How to measure if your business building efforts are working" - A guest post by Michele Christensen

How to measure if your business building efforts are working

by Michele Christensen

As the owner of a coaching business, you do a lot to build your business. There are many ways to bring in new clients and customers and new ways pop up all the time. It’s easy to fall into the trap of doing more and more, and to continue to add new business building tactics until it becomes too much to manage.

The key to building your business without overwhelm is to focus on what works best for you. What will work best depends on your talents and temperament as well as your target market. Some people have found huge success on Facebook, others speak on live stages. Blogging brings great results for some, one-on-one sales calls work well for others.

So how do you figure out what works best for you? The only answer is to measure your results. It helps to start with a sound idea that has a good chance of working in your situation, but the only way to know for sure how well something works is to measure the results.

Before you implement any new idea, it’s critical that you know why you are doing this new thing and what you hope to accomplish by doing it. For example, you might be using Pinterest with the goal of generating traffic to your website. The general goals would be to have more people visit your site in a given period such as a month after you begin using Pinterest, and you will also want to see specific numbers of people visiting your site from Pinterest.

At this point, it’s important to note that when measuring results you might set specific goals such as 100 unique visitors from Pinterest, or you might set general goals such as “get traffic from Pinterest.” You may also start with a general goal of “more traffic” and then try to improve it month over month and hit specific numbers. Both general goals of “more” and specific numeric goals work, and the key thing is that you have a goal.

Once you’ve set a goal for your new idea, figure out how you will gather the data you need to measure your results. If it’s a traffic goal, you might need to install traffic analyzing software such as Google Analytics. If it’s a certain number of clicks, you can use a link shortening service such as bit.ly to tell you exactly how many people clicked on a specific link. If it’s teleseminar signups, you’ll want to capture those so they can be counted. Once you know what you need to measure (traffic, clicks, signups, etc) it will be much easier to find the tool you need than if you are grasping at straws.

Next, begin tracking your results. Compare them over time as you make changes and see if you can improve. What happens if you do the same thing for 3 months? If you double your efforts, do you double your results? Is it worth the time you put in?

If you already measure your results, great! If not, get started today. Pick one thing you already do that you don’t track the outcomes for and start measuring. It’s the only way to know for sure what is working and the only way to make sure you are spending your time in the right place.

About Michele Christensen

Michele ChristensenMichele Christensen is a business coach and mentor for solopreneurs. She teaches people how to have a profitable, sustainable one-person business they can run from home without overwhelm or working 24/7. For more information and free resources, find her online at michelechristensen.com, or on the social sites.

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Apr 19 2013

Seven Pieces of Advice From Top Coaching Clients

Category: Guest Post — This is a post by a Guest Author @ 6:30 am

What advice would your clients give coaches? In today’s guest post Richard Nugent shares:

"Seven Pieces of Advice From Top Coaching Clients" A guest post by Richard Nugent

Seven Pieces of Advice From Top Coaching Clients

by Richard Nugent

In preparation for this article, I thought I’d ask some of my coaching clients what they wanted and needed from a coach most of all. Some answers surprised me, some I completely expected and, while I hope all are factors that you already take into account when coaching, they are all great reminders of good coaching practice.

To give you a flavour, the clients I asked included several Executives of large organisations, various entrepreneurs, a professional footballer, a senior training manager, some business coaches and teacher. I have coached all of them for some time and all are pretty demanding of themselves and their coach!

I asked them all the same question ‘what is the single most important thing that a coach must do’? Here are the seven most common answers.

1. Keep in touch. Whether between sessions or during breaks in the coaching relationship. The coaching relationship must be on going and consistent even when the actual coaching isn’t.

2. Focus on helping me to understand how I can achieve my outcomes. Everyone is different; don’t assume that there is a right way for everyone.

3. Be you. A coaching relationship works best with you feel the coach is being themselves. Don’t be one way when we meet then turn into a different person when you coach.

4. Be respectful of the trust and investment that I am making in you. I am likely to be telling you things that I haven’t told my closest family. I may have also spent my whole development budget for the year with you. Occasionally let me know that you appreciate that.

5. Know when to be really tough with me and kick my butt and when to support me. (I’d call this emotional intelligence – what is clear from clients’ responses that we have to have it on full in every session. One client even used the phrase “don’t be too nice, I’m not looking for a friend, I’ve got plenty of those.”)

6. Keep asking great questions. Make me think differently to how I am now. Also keep asking me great, different questions – I never know what is coming next and that keeps me on my toes.

7. Keep developing. Clients love the fact that I am always learning and they feel that they are getting the benefit of that. This answer was especially prevalent in clients whose development budgets were tight.

These were the top seven, most consistent answers. Some clients felt really strongly about other things, including technical knowledge, business acumen (if you’re helping me build my business, yours should already be more successful) and even the size of network I have.

What occurs to be is that if this is a representation of the important thoughts my clients have, focussing on them is going to help me be a great coach for them and many others.

About the author

Richard is the M.D. of Twenty One Leadership and has coached talented people from the fields of sport and business for the last decade. Clients have credited him with everything from million pound transfers to the creation of new market leading organisations. The return on investment from his programmes stretches into the millions of Pounds, Euros and Dollars.

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Apr 12 2013

My Weapon of Choice: Self-Confidence

Category: Guest Post — This is a post by a Guest Author @ 6:30 am

In today’s guest post coach health coach Susan DiGiaimo shares some thoughts around confidence and how that is influencing her work.

"My Weapon of Choice: Self-Confidence" A guest post by Susan DiGiaimo

My Weapon of Choice: Self-Confidence

by Susan DiGiaimo

Everyday you have a choice to make things better, make better choices and do something for yourself. Some days are better than others. On those particular days when things do not go as well we usually end up beating up ourselves. I have learned from my own experiences that you just have to keep on going, thinking positively and moving forward.

Where did I gain this self-confidence? My mother was an extremely powerful role model for me. She had and still has a very strong work ethic. ”You can accomplish anything if you put your mind to it.” She also helped shape me into the woman I am today and I am thankful for that. Strong, transparent, empathetic, these are just some of the words that describe me.

I know now as a mother of three that, if you do not take the time to take care of yourself, you are not going to do a good job taking care of anyone else. Self-confidence is not something we inherit, we don’t learn it in school like Algebra, and it is definitely a challenge for some of us to gain. Ask me if I ever used Algebra again in my professional career, no. I would probably have benefited from a class about how to gain self-confidence.

Health self-esteem is like our armor against the challenges of the world. Individuals who know their strengths and weaknesses and feel good about themselves seem to have an easier time handling conflicts and resisting negative pressure. As we try, fail, try again, fail again, and then finally succeed, we develop ideas about our own capabilities. Now for kids self-esteem fluctuates as they grow. It is every evolving based on their experiences and perceptions.

I have a daughter who is nine years old. Her personality traits are being fun, loving, smart, determined, confident, and huggable. She didn’t always know why she was unique and what she was passionate about. She is constantly changing and growing like all of us.

We need to appreciate our children as they are for what they are. As kids grow and develop, their overall sense of self-confidence and personal worth grows and changes too. Self-confidence is about how confident we feel about our talents and abilities, not just how others perceive us. Children with self-confidence feel secure about themselves, regardless of how smart or successful others say they are.

I initiated a Kids Fitness Program first focusing on girls. We know that a girl’s self-confidence is based a great deal on how she looks and how others perceive her. Unfortunately society, media, our child’s access to computers and different technologies makes them even more vulnerable to not having good self-esteem.

I wanted to give girls the opportunity to be able to express and develop their key personality traits and recognize what makes them special or unique. I also wanted the girls to learn proper exercise technique and to understand what it means to live a healthy lifestyle. I believe this needs to start at a much earlier age and my classes start with kids in Kindergarten.

There are different exercises and activities for each age group and we know that because we are motivated by others. Competition is healthy and it let these girls come out of their shells, speak amongst their peers and also get stronger physically. The entire purpose is so when they continue on into Middle School or High School they are very aware of who they are and how they can put their best foot forward.

I know these kids absorb information like little sponges. Armed with Monkey tape, journals, and mats I set off to teach these girls how to do lunges, squats, mountain climbers, and push ups. No question the Monkey tape was a huge success. I place this so-called Monkey tape on the floor for proper placement of their feet for squats and lunges. By the last week they didn’t even need it.

Class was not easy. Even a seasoned athlete would have found it to be somewhat challenging. ”You are almost there, (now all the girls are counting down with me), 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 high fives everyone!” ”Give me five more and then we can get some water.” Most of the time everyone would give me five more. You are much stronger than you think. I tell this to my adult Boot Camp class as well. Mind over matter. They have to understand that they are not going to get it right the first time, but if they continue to try, they will succeed. Things happen by choice not by chance.

I am very proud of my girls in my first class and I look forward to seeing some of them again and watching them continue to gain more and more self-confidence. More importantly let your child’s personality shine, love them for who they are, not what you want them to be. I want them all to keep that sparkle in their eye and never let it fade.

Self-confidently Yours,

Susan

About the Susan DiGiaimo

First and foremost I am a mother of 3 wonderful kids. I learned and not until much later in life that your family is the most important thing above and beyond everything else. Another thing is if you are passionate about something then go after it, take the CAN out of CAN’T and make it happen. You have to love what you do first then nothing else matters. I have also been teaching Boot Camp at 5AM now for almost 10 years. I teach that class 4 days per week and other 2 I teach an Xtreme treadmill class and Xtreme Spin. I love the reward of seeing someone’s life change for the better. This is my passion, incorporating health and wellness into everyone.

Read Susan’s blog at FitForensics

Connect with Susan on Twitter at twitter.com/susandigiaimo

 

 

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Apr 05 2013

15 Suggestions To Help You Create A Post-Session Ritual

Category: Guest Post — This is a post by a Guest Author @ 6:30 am

Frederique Murphy shares her knowledge and experience in today’s guest post.

"15 Suggestions To Help You Create A Post-Session Ritual" A guest post by Frederique Murphy

15 Suggestions To Help You Create A Post-Session Ritual

By Frederique Murphy

You know, how you prepare yourself for your first coaching session of the day, right? Because, you know, how important it is to be at your top to best help your client. So, has it ever happened to you that your energy winds down from one client to another, leaving you with the feeling that you were not quite at your top, for that second, third or fourth client? If you are booking several clients on the same day, and do not do anything between your sessions, then this is probably a familiar feeling.

Creating rituals as part of your coaching business is a great best practice as rituals help you perform better. We often hear about pre-session rituals, and the post-session rituals are as important. Having a post-session ritual is absolutely critical, particularly when coaching several clients on the same day to ensure you are at your top for your first client, and then your second one, and your third one, etc.

I don’t believe there is a ‘one size fits all’ post-session ritual; I strongly believe that you need to create the ritual that will work for you. Before you start creating your ritual, I suggest you list the various outcomes, so that you are very clear on what is it that you want to achieve: clear your energy, relax, focus, energise, be present, let go…, and then, include the necessary steps. Remember, it is your ritual, and will include as many steps as you need it to meet your defined outcomes.

Here are 15 suggestions to create your very own post-session ritual that will help you be at your top, from one client to another throughout the day:

  • (the must one!) your ritual will work best when you intentionally take the time to do it, so avoid booking your sessions back-to-back, and ensure you have the time to apply your ritual,
  • consciously breathe,
  • meditate,
  • visualise,
  • practice a yoga sequence,
  • drink a large glass of water,
  • prepare a cup of tea,
  • light a candle or incense,
  • open the room windows and/or doors,
  • say a specific affirmation,
  • play a specific song,
  • do a specific move,
  • look at a specific imagery,
  • change outfit or accessories,
  • take a shower (you might not include this suggestion as part of your standard ritual, but do keep it in mind for those “intense” sessions).

Once you have created your ritual, apply it every single time, after every coaching session, and even after your last session of the day. A ritual is driven by intention, so focus on that intention, and apply your ritual to be at your top, client after client.

Do you already have your own post-session ritual? What steps do you find work best for you? I’d love for you to share; this will be helpful for the other coaches. Comment below!

About the Author/Further Resources

Frederique MurphyFrederique Murphy is a mindset strategist, who specialises in the areas of Inspirational Strategy, Leadership, Communication, Change, Impact, and Achievement. Thanks to her Mountain Moving Mindset platform, Frederique provides individuals, corporate executives, and entrepreneurs with a wealth of mindset resources to help them strategise with vision, design with clarity, plan with focus, and lead with momentum. She shares her M3 Power through her transformational range of innovative products, coaching services, #1 Amazon Best Seller book, award-winning blog, articles and newsletters, unforgettable talks and life-changing events. She believes in guiding her clients through unforgettable journeys towards their own true wealth as they become the true leaders of their life, career and business. For more information on Frederique’s transformational range, visit FrederiqueMurphy.com, join the free M3 Power Community, and start climbing now!

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Mar 29 2013

Coaching Tips from Jesus’ I AM Statements

Category: Guest Post — This is a post by a Guest Author @ 6:30 am

As this week’s guest post falls on Good Friday, spiritual formation coach Toni Knights shares a little about how her beliefs as a Christian fit with her coaching.

"Coaching Tips from Jesus’ I AM Statements" A guest post by spiritual formation coach Toni Knights

Coaching Tips from Jesus’ I AM Statements

by Toni Knights

Spiritual formation coaching sets Christian coaches apart from other professional coaches because it is Christ centered. As a spiritual formation coach, I see life from another perspective – God’s.

In this season of Easter, as we commemorate the resurrection of the world’s premier life coach, I thought it fitting to look at some of His famous [albeit controversial] statements and how Spiritual Formation Coaches carry out these declarations in our practices. These analogies were originally spoken to an agrarian society; however, they can still resonate with coaches today. I believe that one of the basic tenets of coaching is closing the gap between what my clients think and what they do and in order to do this, I must wear different hats and play varying roles which include but are not limited to the following:

  • Jesus said, “I am the bread of life.” Just as bread sustains physical life, so He offers and sustains spiritual life. My role as coach is to provide the required sustenance in the form of motivation as the client expands his/her vision and takes practical steps towards it.
  • Jesus said, “I am the light of the world.” To a world stumbling around in darkness, He is a constant guide.  At times, when I coach I literally shed light on situations for clients by reframing a situation so it can be perceived differently, because people believe the supernatural is all around them.  With a different perception my clients are more likely to act upon their goals.
  • Jesus said, “I am the door of the sheep.” By using this analogy to describe a scenario where there were no physical doors, Jesus likened His care and devotion to ushering his listeners to a safe environment. A passionate coach literally serves as the door to clients as they transition from one stage of their lives to another, while making them comfortable to embrace the new stage. I remind clients that knowing God is an eternal process, not an overnight event.
  • Jesus said, “I am the good shepherd.” This statement shows Jesus’ commitment to the well-being of His followers through constant direction. The client benefits from the coach’s direction when the vision appears to be unattainable. With the proper guidance, clients can overcome self-sabotaging issues which become obstacles along the way. My clients are encouraged to keep the end in view.
  • Jesus said, “I am the resurrection and the life.” Plain and simple – Jesus came to give new life. As a coach, I have the humbling yet awesome job of reviving any dream the client may have given up on. A client can be effectively helped to creatively manage current obstacles and achieve a once-dormant goal.
  • Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth and the life.” To my mind, this declaration shows us that Jesus pointed the way to a better life with truth. Assistance with Accountability! In order for change to be effective there must be honesty. It is such a privilege to watch clients move from what actually is to what ought to be with honesty – with themselves first and then with their environment.
  • Jesus said, “I am the true vine.”By attaching themselves to Jesus, his followers draw nourishment and bear fruit. As I partner (attach) with clients to achieve their goals, I conform to the selfless attributes of Christ for their sake, thus making the partnership a fruitful one.

As we continue to be creative with our clients, we can consider our various roles in light of these statements.

Have a blessed Easter Season!

About the author

Toni Knights is a Christian Life Coach who runs the coaching practice “Life In Process.” She also facilitates workshops that focus upon self improvement.

You can read her weekly blog at http://justthinking-knightstoni.blogspot.com.

You can also find Toni on Facebook at www.facebook.com/knightstoni

 

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